14 Years [GNR/Mötley Crüe]

The Wedding-II

Nadia:

"Look at Mama, over there, look," I tried to grab Charlotte's attention as she tried to pull and get rid of the pretty bow she was wearing.

Saying 'Mama' did distract her from her task, and she looked towards Phoebe, who stood at the altar along with the bridesmaids. She gabbled, twisting in Andy's arm, looking at her mom, and then looked at Andy and babbled something.

"I'm bored," Alex sighed, sitting between Andy and me on the white, cushioned wooden chair. He looked so adorable in his little suit. I still remember the day he was born; he was such an adorable baby!

I wasn't sure how he could get bored. If this were a church wedding, yeah, I would get it. But this was an extravagant outdoor wedding set in the Napa Valley during early Summer. It was an embodiment of the perfect wedding.

The air smelled sweet of summer and vineyards and roses as the sun began to lower towards the valley behind the altar that was decorated with white roses. There were flowers everywhere, on the altar, on the seats of the guests, and petals of white roses carpeted the aisle.

But of course, Alex was a kid who couldn't appreciate beauty even if it struck him like a bolt of lightning.

"It will only take a few more minutes," I told him and turned to admire the happy couple.

Since I wasn't around, I couldn't go with her for the bridal shopping, but she did show it to me last night before all the guys came in, and it looked spectacular on her.

It was an off-shoulder dress with a long train. It had minimal beading and a subtle ivory hue, and layers of Chantilly lace. It was the perfect dress. I wouldn't go for something similar if I got married, it wouldn't suit my frame like it suits her.

I felt Vince's suit could be better, but like most men, he doesn't care, but to his credit, his hair was in top-notch condition.

My eyes wandered from the couple and across to the aisle until I spotted a green suit that stuck out like a sore thumb among the guests. His arm was casually splayed over Jennifer's seat as they laughed at something.

We spoke for a while last night until the bride and groom kicked out everyone else for a little alone time. After that, we went our separate ways. It was only catching up about the past one and a half years. I bought a house and he sold his. I live in New York, and he's on tour. He has been talking to his therapist pretty regularly. He was dating someone twelve years younger than him, and I wasn't dating anyone. I'm not sure why the age gap shocks me when he's not the first guy I know to date someone so young. It's just weird. I could never date a guy younger than me or a guy who was older than me by four years at max.

Overall, we were both doing pretty well with life.

We smiled at each other when he looked across the aisle towards me before looking towards the altar as Jane and Vince began to exchange their vows and soon their rings as their faces beamed with happiness over the promises of being with each other in sickness and in health, through joys and sorrows, for richer or poorer till death did them part.

I was an atheist and haven't set foot inside a church for a sermon since I was a child, but a verse from the priest stuck with me.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

It spoke about a kind of idolized love, the kind I neither received nor showed to anyone. I was kind but not patient, I never dishonored, but I kept a record of wrongs. I didn't have to think about Jordan; it wasn't love, it was control and cruelty masked under love. But I had to take a moment and reflect on my relationship with Axl.