[CONTENT WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS MASSIVE FEMALE WEIGHT GAIN AND A LITTLE BIT OF SLOB (FOOD TRASH, MESSY EATING & BURPING). IF YOU'RE NOT INTO THAT, YOU MAY WISH TO TAKE YOUR READING NEEDS ELSEWHERE.]
"Ah, lady and gentleman, thank you so much for your time!"
"Save it, Oscar." A cold and callous look from the businesswoman at the other end of the table briefly silenced the eccentric who had been speaking. The businesswoman went on. "I can't believe you have the nerve to come crawling to your investors again less than one year after that little candy store of yours went under."
"Uh-uh-uh," Oscar corrected. "It was a candy emporium. Way larger and higher-class than just any old candy store."
The businessman sitting next to the skeptical businesswoman cleared his throat, joining into the conversation. "Which makes it all the more jarring that it managed to lose the entirety of its profits thanks to an employee going on a multi-day sugar binge."
The businessman slid a newspaper down the conference table. Oscar glanced down at it, being greeted with a picture of an overstuffed young woman.
NO SUGARCOATING IT: BOARDWALK CANDY STORE SHUTTERS DOORS AFTER 95% OF MERCHANDISE EATEN BY ROGUE EMPLOYEE.
"The warning signs were present from the beginning," says Pete; coworker.
More on Page 7
"This actually fits into what I wanted to discuss today," Oscar slid the paper back down to the businessman. "But don't worry yourself too much; these local papers always exaggerate their stories to try and get picked up by the mainstream media. Why, just last week I read a piece about a circus with a morbidly obese clown as its featured attraction!"
The businesswoman quickly scanned the paper, and looked back up at Oscar. "So, a ridiculously obese young worker named Prisha Kapur didn't eat all of the merchandise, then?"
Oscar went quiet. "Uh, well ..."
"That's what I thought."
"Come on! Henry, Susan, listen to reason!"
"Why don't you try it?" the businessman, Henry, shot back with a scowl. "Your investors - including us - lost hundreds of thousands of dollars each in that financial catastrophe!"
"My business ventures have made the company millions more," Oscar replied, shrugging. "You've got to break a few eggs to make an omelet, and I believe that the SugarPorium and its unfortunate closure shattered some eggs. Allow me to present you with the omelet."
Henry and Susan shared an uneasy look, but one that was somewhat curious. "Go on."
Oscar turned around to face his personal assistant, who sat at a laptop plugged into a big screen. "Hit it, Nigel."
Nigel pressed a button, and a PowerPoint presentation started. Henry and Susan involuntarily winced at the first slide. About two dozen pictures, taken off of social media judging by their captions, showcased the morbidly obese girl laying in the middle of the SugarPorium, resting on her laurels after gorging herself into a giant, bloated blob. Some of the social media posts featured had humorous captions and filters.
"Exhibit A: Prisha Kapur in the SugarPorium on its last day of business," Oscar gestured to the screen behind him. "These were just 25 of the more than one hundred pictures taken at the scene. A small crowd gathered to see the big fat girl absolutely stuffed to the gills."
"This is a very bad start to a request for more money," Susan warned.
"Just listen!" Oscar demanded, looking a bit peeved at the interruption. "This scene generated a spectacle! And spectacle means people want to be there to witness it!"
