I hate you because I can't

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I hate you because I can't even hate you

A sentence that has been so profound in my life

I find myself pondering this sentence over and over again

So much anger and love collided into one sentence

I don't even hate you because I love you

I miss you

I miss our bond and memories

I miss how we used to laugh hard until my stomach hurt

You hurt me while I was still

I showed up when you didn't

I was there when you weren't there for me

I did everything I could, yet you did nothing

I place a boundary, and you laugh

You laugh it off, thinking I was a joke

The boundary I placed was real

I hate you because I can't even have you

I can't even let it go because if I do, I know I will go right back on my word 

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