A Prayer for understanding

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God;
I am so hurt right now and feeling so conflicted Lord

I do not know what to do anymore

And it's hurting me over and over

The tears want to come down my face Lord

 I do not understand

I do not know what is going on

I am determined to become a better person

a better friend, a better sister, a better Christian lord

I do not understand what to do or how to act around them, lord

I see them every day together

I see them laughing and hanging out

It pains me

It left me feeling  confused and  angry

Why can't I be a part of it lord

Why can't I get the same energy back when I text

God I know you see everything but

Can't you see how badly this situation is hurting me and the confusion I am feeling

I feel like I cannot have a friend group without it breaking apart lord

It hurt me God

I feel like there is nothing that I can do except to sit here and watch as all the memories we made

Mean nothing

I mean nothing to them, lord

I do not get it but I want to Lord

God, 

You saw how hard I tried time after time with no response, no action being taken, Lord.

I am exhausted being the only one putting effort and everything into a friendship.p

Into asking if they want to hang out

I am tired

I do not know what else I can do except to wait

Every time I see them it hurts me

I act like I am over it or that it doesn't hurt me but it does

It hurts badly

My heart feels the weight and it weighs heavily on me

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