Avengers Imagines/Preferences (COMPLETED)

Since You All Like Being Updated With My Life

GUESS WHAT TIME IT IS!!!!! RANT TIME!!!!!!!

Okay so i went to the doctors today and the nurse that i had my appointment for (cant even see a doctor anymore these days its horrid) took my height and my weight and checked my blood pressure, the usual shit that happens at the doctors. Well we went over my growth chart/bmi/wieght chart and she said i was overwieght for my height. Which i already knew. I was like thanks for basically calling me fat lady i beat myself up about it all the time, i already knew i was fat didnt have to point it out thanks, like youre not even a real doctor. And then she asked my mom to leave the room so she could talk to me one on one, she started talking to me like i was a child and she read over my 'psych' evaluation sheet and started asking me about why i didnt sleep so i started talking about my anxiety and she was like oh so youre aware of this and i swear to god i pulled the sam winchester bitch face. Like offuckingcourse i am aware!!!!!!!! Why do you think i said something!!!!!!!!!!!!! Then she started questioning me about why i didnt like to go in public. Like are you serious. Then she said i had social anxiety and then she denied saying i had any form of anxiety! Like my fucking theripist diagnosed me with generalized anxiety in 7th grade and youre saying i just need to learn to cope. Yes because i can cope when i only get about 2-3 hours a night because my axniety works me into a tizzy,i can hardly think. And then she said let me check your heart so i said okay and i swear to god she put the stethascope thing on the right side of my body. Uhm your hearts on your left side dumbass. She asked if wanted to talk to a counsler and i said no because my therapist wasnt much help last time and theres really no point to talk to one because i can listen to what they have to say and in the end its up to me if i want to do what they say. Literally all thats repeating in my mind is you need to learn to cope alanna. I know how to cope lady but i dont think you understand some of my coping methods have to due with me ripping apart my flesh and i dont think you want that. IVE BEEN TRYING TO COPE FOR YEARS WOMAN YOU JUST SAYING WELL GO OUT IN PUBLIC ANYWAY AND YOU NEED TO COPE DO NOT HELP ME I REPEAT YOU ARE NOT HELPING THE SITUATION YOU UNCULTURED SWINE!!!!

rant over.

Im done now, im sorry i needed to get that off my chest it was bothering me. And it was annoying because mental illness runs in my family so yeah. Therapy doesnt help me anymore because i pretty much learned that no matter how much guidance you recieve the world is full of shitty people willing to test your limits and then wait for you to get angry and act like they did nothing to you. If anything she made it worse for me today. And to top it all off i had to get my blood drawn. I have a fear and hate for needles so i bet you can guess how well that went. Okay im done ranting now i swear. I still have plenty of empty space on my notebook if you guys want your names or even usernames on there just comment and let me know and my requests for my new book are still open for the time being. I love you guys. Byeeee