Some Day One Day

51.5

"Mom?" I had made the call with the cell phone they'd granted me as part of my graduation present.
"Hey sweetheart. How was prom?" she sounded pretty relaxed and I guess it was because she trusted I was at Angie's house. It would be easy for her to find out that I wasn't there though because all she'd have to do was make a quick call to Angie's parents. Since I knew it was only a matter of time before she called them, I decided to make the call and lay all the cards on the table.
It was time to take a stand and let her know the path that I had decided on.
"It was great. Shawn looked so nice in his tux Mom," I said hoping to lure her in, "We had a great time."
The line grew quiet and I was despondent. 

"Mom?"
"Yes. So he really was your date?" she asked dryly.
"Yes..."
"Oh," she muttered after a moment's silence, "Well I would never expect guys like him to go to prom."
"Guys like him?" I asked exhaustingly. We had these arguments on a daily basis. Everytime I thought I was getting closer and closer to convincing them they'd return to attack mode and state ever reason under the sun why Shawn wasn't good enough.
"I just think Lee would've been a better person to accompany you to it that's all-"
"Mommy why don't you like Shawn? You've never even met him."
"I haven't?" the shrewd way in which she asked reminded me of the unfortunate way in which they met.
"You caught him at a bad time alright. Someone had hurt his sister and he was really upset about it."
"And solving violence with violence is the key right?"
"Shawn would be the first one to say it's not Mom. Trust me." As I said the words a faint smile lifted my lips when I recalled a few months back when we'd snuck out to a party and I'd almost gotten into a fight with a girl for trying to talk to him. It was a little bit too much on my account but I was so wrapped around Shawn and wired up that I didn't want anyone to come close. Having had to pull me away from the brewing brawl Shawn had sat me down in the bathroom with that serious look he always got when he was about to lecture me-this time telling me frankly that I was being stupid trying to fight some girl over him like I didn't have the common sense to just walk away and ignore them.
"I still don't want you with that street boy-"
"What is wrong with you?" I found myself talking back to my mom, which was something I rarely did up until I met Shawn, "You were never a judgmental person. You understand what it's like not to have much. You understand what it's like to be poor. Stop blaming him for not having a lot of money. It's stupid. It's old. And it's tired. It's not his fault and he's doing everything that he can-"
"Since when do you get off talking to me like that? Oh, since you met that boy."
The familiar tears welled in my eyes at her words, "Why do you hate me for being with him? You don't know him Mom."
"I know enough to know that I want you to have nothing to do with him Beyonce. All he's going to bring you is trouble. Isn't that all he's brought you?"
"No. if anything you should be thanking him. He's made me a better person."
"Getting into more trouble is making you a better person? Having shaming grades is making you a better person I suppose? Disrespecting your parents is making you a better person?"
My heart stung, "I'm not disrespecting you Ma! Just because I stand up for what I believe in now doesn't mean I'm disrespecting you."
"There's a difference between standing up for what you believe in and just being plain old stupid. And for you to accuse me of being so judgmental disregarding you to see him because he doesn't have money really makes me upset. It's not the fact that he doesn't have money. Had he had money and still caused the trouble he causes I would not be disapproving-"
"Oh my god!" I exploded, "What fucking trouble does he cause? Mom he hasn't done anything wrong!"
As far as I was concerned, my parents knew nothing about Shawn's recent means of accumulating money. Before it was simply because of the unfavorable ways they'd met him-both times with him getting taken away by the cops unfairly. Then to add salt to the open wound it had partially been my fault for being so absorbed with him that I spent less time with them, went out a lot more, and had a devastating plunge in my studies. But by the time I improved on my grades they'd already made their mind up about him-he was bad news in their eyes.
"Don't you use that language and tone with me. Boyfriend or not, I'm going to always be your mother. When he's gone, I'm still going to be your mother. Do I make myself clear?" My mother warned and by then I was crying softly, shaking slightly from the rage that plundered my strength.
"Why can't you just see him the way I see him?" I asked her, moreso begged her quietly. It was that moment I found that I often asked the rest of the world that question. I wanted to grab them and shake them and scream at them that they were missing out on a great person but even then I'm sure it would be to no avail. This world was so biased that once its mind was made up everything told to it fell on deaf ears and I was no exception.
Apparently even for my mother.
"Do I make myself clear?" she reiterated. Normally I would've condescended just to get her off of my back but I couldn't.
"I'm not a fool Beyonce. I know what guys like Shawn do. Yes I grew up poor, me and my siblings alike. But we never succumbed to the things these young people are doing today-"
"What things." I dared her, a slither of fear crawling into me. Back then what my parents had to say about the things Shawn 'did' were simply assumptions. Mere conjured up explanations of why he was the way he was. I'd tried over and over to explain to them he wasn't-and I knew I was getting through to my father moreso than my mother-but they just never budged. They still saw him as danger which anyone who knew Shawn would've found humorous. He was the least dangerous person I knew!
"Beyonce I don't want you to see that boy. You're too young to be serious with him the way you are anyway." My mother opted when I knew she had no real evidence to back up the accusations she directed at Shawn.
But goodness the one thing they hypothesized he did was the one thing that had become true. If only