There will never be a proper explanation to describe what it's like to look into the eyes of someone whom you're in love with, or whom you know or at least hope is in love with you with the same amount of depth and passion. Standing there before him nakedly, standing before him with as much honesty as a person could have, I gazed back at him through a sea of joyful yet apprehensive tears.
For several moments my heart had stopped like a child reluctant of stepping into a new warm home when all they had known were the cold hard streets.
When my heart began to beat again, it created a deep pain in the center of my chest, which I'm sure came from my dead soul as it slowly revived to life. The life that only his presence could give me. That distinctly familiar pain made my breaths shallow, slow, and strenuously controlled.
He hadn't even touched me yet, but my body was already a bundle of heat impatiently waiting to be extinguished. I could only surmise what would happen when I felt his hands on me.
I didn't have to wait too long to find out.
With our eyes glued to one another, I couldn't see where his hands were headed. But the powerful force of his touch when he did touch me was so potent. So much that I shuddered and let out a shaky breath when an electrical charge tore through me from the tips of my curling toes to my hair follicles.
His fingers and his palms were like hot ice, trailing from the curvaceous arc of my hips to the firm bone of my waistline over to the svelte indention of my waist. A fire that inflicted deep within me sparked up from his heavenly touch began to burn so promisingly I began to hurt inside.
I breathed deeply as his fingers encircled my rib cage, his thumbs rubbing the crescent-shaped curve beneath my achingly aroused breasts. The reaction of his touch was a hot and cold phenomenon that left me convulsing as though I stood in front of a full blowing fan. Each beat in my heart was a long way from the next, therefore making me gasp deeply for air and exhale with slow carefulness. I thought I was suffocating from the sudden nervous cloud that had shrouded me.
I thought I would suffocate from the loving warmth I felt radiating from him.
Erect there before the only man I had ever loved and would ever love, I began to fear that this wasn't real. I began to fear that this was one of the many dreams that would often evolve into wrenching nightmares that would then tragically leave me waking up in a lonely bed with only my cold tears as consolation.
I had only dreamed of this day, and now that it was here, I couldn't believe it.
Compressing my lips tightly to stifle a moan when the urge to cry became strong, I placed my hand over the center of my chest where the pain nestled.
"I'm so nervous." I confessed genuinely through a breathy, coy whisper, before letting out a whimper that made my clamp my hands over my mouth.
"It's okay." Shawn promised tenderly. My throat ached faintly when sizzling heat spiraled to my tautening nipples, which, if they had a voice, they would be yearningly screaming for him to take them and bathe them with his mouth to cool them down. Still, my emotions impeded the physical arousal my body
"I, Oh my god..." I whizzed, gulping heavy amounts of air when I thought hyperventilation was at bay, "I can't believe this. I can't breath. Oh...Shawn..."
Like a sprinkler's knob was turned, tears spurted out of me when I burst into a sudden lugubrious meltdown.
Shamed by my sensitivity I cowed my face away from his avidly watching eyes to bury it into my trembling hands. All my insecurities spilled right along with my tears.
"I can't...believe this either..." he whispered gruffly along my hairline, his soft lips tracing gentle, chaste kisses down my temple. The kisses placated me but only a little bit.
"No-I-" gulping nervously hard at the taut knot in my throat, I shook my head jerkily when all his consistent kisses did was make me cry and shrink away in the same that still lingered, "I don't deserve-"
"No...you don't." Shawn's hands pried shaking fingers from my face and I stared at him in shock, hoping that this was not one of his many, whimsy shifts in moods. Clipping my chin with his thumb and index finger, he tilted my head until I was gazing up at him, tears flowing down my temple onto my ears.
"We deserve this," biting his lip pensively, he nodded, his eyes glistening like they had earlier.
Shawn's other hand closed around my left rib cage, and he pressed his palm against my thrumming heart.
"We deserve this Bey. That's why we're here..." a soft smile lifted his lips and left brow, "right?"
Speechless, all I could do was stare at Shawn letting my tears do my talking for me. Even in my chocked up state, Shawn lowered his head until our lips touched. Another exultant cry tore through my throat at the feel of his soft skin, sending wave after wave of electricity through my lightly quivering body. Granting him the superiority to possess my mouth first to show that I was surrendering completely to him, I let his skilled tongue paint my lips with his nectar before allowing him to cleave them apart. This was an emblem of dominance that I didn't mind and one that he didn't apologize for. I was his and he was mine and that was what him kissing me in such a manner meant. He thrust into me with an unhurried sensuality that said he wanted to savor this moment and record it into his heart for all eternity. I did the same. The kiss whirred my soul to life and I didn't feel like the old me, but I felt an acquaintance with my new self that was beyond description.
I was alive and because of that I pushed my tongue forward to meet his.
I felt him shudder against me and I knew then the same love that showered over me showered him too.
Our body language in sync now, Shawn's tongue finally met with mine halfway; the same way we'd met that evening he accepted my first gift of the jacket. Nothing could amount to the feeling of him-the person. Not the cars, not the money, not even the ring. He was a priceless gift, a one of a kind gift, the greatest gift I had ever received in my life. Those were the only thoughts that soared through me as our tongues sleekly swept and caressed against each other. It was a lot ardent and passionate than all the other kisses we'd given each other subsequent to our meeting four years later. it was passionate because it was a kiss of liberation.
It was the kiss of a new beginning.
My hands, which were still fragile from the panic attack that I was still descending from, tentatively touched the warm skin of his arm.
If love had the ability of tangibility, it would be Shawn's skin.
He felt like love.
Pulling back briefly, a suckling sound made me sigh with my lips tingeing into a faint smile at how seductive it was to me. Not leaving me bereft for too long, Shawn tilted his head and reunited our lips, pressing his firmly over mine before plunging into my mouth again and making the erogenous temples of my body throb. The hand that had once held my chin was now secured around my nape, this thumb affectionately brushing the sensitized spot behind my ear. It gave the center of my back a warm fuzzy feeling.
His other hand didn't linger over the rhythm of my heart, but hiked upwards to cloak over my erect left breast. My back tensed when heat flared throughout the base of my spine up to my shoulders before shooting to my now beady nipples. Placing heat a notch higher, Shawn's kiss gained more momentum and his thumb began an erotically whimsical massage over my tautened nipple. This all made my senses begin to hum in a gleeful way that made my body sway towards his. With that he brought along the gyrating of his pelvis against my thighs which were wilting apart in submission wanting to feel every inch of him. I felt him through the bulk of his jeans, percolating onto his denim covering. His provocative movement and touch had us both gasping and my body's hum had upgraded to a soulful song that had me whispering love notes of pleasure.
"Mmm..." I moaned into his wonderful mouth, my hands enjoying the heat and rippling muscles of a true man as I touched him with brimming desperation.
"You love me?" Shawn asked rasped into the hot cavern of my mouth and before I could respond his tongue penetrated my mouth. He then curled its head smoothly over the roof of my mouth before pulling out in a torturously slow fashion. I was seized by waves of euphoria and left breathless from how he did that.
Before I could utter a coherent answer even though I truly didn't think I could, he repeated the same action. All the while his hand traversed searchingly from my breast, trailed down the flat plane of my stomach, circled my belly button leaving me ticklish before resting at the shrub of soft curls belonging to my womanhood.
Groaning lustily under his breath, Shawn broke from the kiss having my eyes fluttering open in slight irritation, only to follow his, which were intensely trained, on his hands strokes of my springy hairs.
"Baby..." I croaked when heat smoldered deep in my gut from the soft circles he drew as he inched lower and lower...
"Love me?" he repeated coarsely.
"Always." I rasped, unable to stay away from him too long. Diving my head to the curve of his of his virile neck I lapped him up with a starved tongue that savored the taste of his skin. Using every opportunity I had now that I was blessed to be this close to him I inhaled his scent of expensive cologne along with his natural scent, nearly drunken from the intoxicating way he infiltrated my nostrils up.
Suddenly Shawn thrashed me up against the wall with a kiss that started out fiery that ended up soft. Since I thought we were passed the delicate stage I was confused by the sudden change of him meagerly plucking at my lips, flicking his tongue over me. Those thoughts went out the window when his finger brushed the clitoral hood that lead to my secrecy. White hot balls of fire rolled through my limbs and I breathed sharply at the sensation. My fingers became rigidly stiff as I clung to him wantonly.
"Bay..." I sighed, interchanging between rubbing my hands all over him and clinging.
Shawn's finger glissaded over my sodden clitoris, which was oh so sensitive to the touch, I felt circuits of electric power zapping through my veins. Emitting a startled cry and arched.
My moan of his name was drowned when Shawn's tongue probed further into me. I didn't know which was making me crazier the kiss or the touch.
Using the ball of his finger Shawn began a circular art over my clitoris that made me feel myself gushing and gushing onto his hand and my thighs. Haplessly my hips undulated and matched his movements.
"Fuck..." he grunted against the kiss, which seemed to deepen as his hand continued to quest further. His other hand left the back of my head and splayed over my lower back.
"Mmm...Corey..." my chant was muffled by the carnal kiss. I now felt more than one finger gliding along the wet sensitive lips of my womanhood.
"How many have there been since me..." Shawn had broken the kiss to ask me that and when I saw he wasn't diving back to kiss me my eyes flew open, shattering the stars that had began to form behind my eyelids. His eyes were dark and studious and handsome in the dim lighting. His finger steadily stroked, making me weaker and weaker with each passing second yet still empowering me enough to rotate my hips towards him in need of more.
If it weren't for the demanding tone in his voice and eyes I would've succumbed to the feebleness subjugating my body and not answered him. But I knew this meant a lot to him so I fought that pleasurable torture his skilled hands bestowed me.
"Only you." I panted breathily.
"Ain' nobody else tasted my pussy?" he asked quietly and it was all I could do to stand upright. I had to exert my back muscles onto the door just to keep balance. His words had me so weak that at this point speech had abandoned me and all I could do was shake my head. When he raised a brow sexily and lifted his chin a tad, his fingers still creating magic on lips that began contracting now, I let out a frustrated grunt.
"No one."
"Uh huh..." he said disbelievingly, licking his lips and stepping forward.
"Shawn..." I let out in a strangled breath, the fists of heat slowly closing around me. He licks his lips again and the image taunted me to damn near madness.
"Baby...please..."
"You want me back?" he asked and I nodded vigorously, clinging onto his biceps in order to stand upright.
"Say it." he goaded, he lifted his chin, his sultry eyes too sexy for their own good. He had me tongue tied just from the look on his face. My nipples tightened as he continued to stroke me and at the same time an image of him on top of me as he reached his peak struck my mind.
I suddenly lost my train of thought, fully concentrating on what his fingers were doing to me.
"I want you..." I was unable to finish my plea because his bold fingers crept back to my clitoris, making me shudder all over like a freight train was barreling through me.
For a moment I thought I'd come undone already.
"Tell me you want me to taste you again." He ordered softly as he neared me, looking like Satan's sexy cousin with that mischief on his face. His words had me melting from the heat they enflamed. He knew that what his hands were doing were mind numbingly torturing me...and he also knew that I deviously loved every minute of it.
"I want...Shawn...you...ahh" I flinched when he hit a soft spot, "...stop..."
He suddenly stopped and when I twisted my features in mortification he laughed throatily.
"You know how much I missed what you taste like? You know how fuckin crazy that shit made me?"
"Shawn..."
"Say it..." he goaded and I knew I had to follow orders if I wanted to get something in return.
"Taste me." I whispered in the most terse manner that I knew how and when Shawn smirked lewdly at me I felt myself lubricating all over him. He looked so good like that that I wanted to cry.
At my words Shawn pulled away from me making me let out a disagreeing sob before doing one of the most erotic things I'd ever seen. Shawn's hand came up and the two fingers he'd employed on me glistened in the tenebrous room came up. He then tenderly against my bottom lip with those fingers before leaning closer and sweeping his tongue lavishly over them and letting out a relishing groan that I felt deep within my heart. Not wasting a moment Shawn glided his tongue over my bottom lip before trapping it in his teeth and hissing.
His lips closed over my bottom lip and sucked and sucked hungrily, his sensual moans enough to nearly send me overdrive. He pulled back shortly to speak, his eyes trained to my lips as his fingers returned to my other row of lips that were now dripping lovingly on him.
Then without warning Shawn speared his tongue far into my mouth and threw me for the loop when his finger unwarrantedly shuttled up the engorged walls of my womanhood. My outcry of his name was engulfed by the amorous kiss.
More weakness that I could handle tunneled through me like a bulldozer, liquefying me till I slumped against the door. With lightning speed Shawn's other hand guardedly clinched my waist. This gave me enough time to circle my arms around his shoulders.
What he began doing felt so damn good I got confused for a moment. With the same speed, his tongue and finger would sink into me and pull out just at the same slow pace. Everytime he furled his tongue in my mouth, his finger would duplicate that movement inside of me, making me arch and moan wildly against him.
Just as our bodies began rocking to his hand where all my senses were centered, on the movements of his hand and mouth, Shawn pulled back and slid his finger out of me until it was back to caressing my labia.
"You want this tongue in you?" he asked and there was some secret connotation to his voice that stirred up old memories.
I didn't even have enough energy to nod my answer but thankfully Shawn brought his lips back to mine, sought my tongue and supported it in his teeth. He then flicked his tongue several times over my lip before devouring my mouth again. We began to move backwards, stumbling a couple of times before Shawn fully let go of me.
His finger was still inside of me when he plopped down on the edge of the bed. With his legs on either side of me I stood before him, my hands draped over his broad shoulders for support. Using his other free hand Shawn held the portion behind my knee and drew my leg up until I was half-kneeling against his thigh on the mattress. My head lolled backwards in ecstasy when he began thrusting in and out of me because the angle he'd placed me in allowed him more access into my clenching folds. He only added the building pressure in my chest and only made the fire hotter within me by adding two more fingers, speeding up to a deliciously tormenting pace.
"Feels so fucking good babygirl..." He grunted and began to soar higher into me until he was damn near knuckle deep, "Wet..." he continued gruffly, "Like this...fuck..."
Another moan issued into my throat and I slumped forward, making Shawn use his other hand to hold my waist steadfastly. My head hung forward now as I practically hang over him, using his shoulder
As he vacuumed all the energy from me and replaced it with a pleasure that coursed vastly through my veins, Shawn began pecking light kisses on my navel, murmuring words I couldn't hear for the moment. He blessed my quivering stomach with moist, hot kisses, lashing his hot tongue over me, leaving a blazing trail. The tip of his tongue delved into the indentation of my bellybutton persistently, making me gasp in need of air. I could feel that familiar tingling sensation that began faintly in the center of my toes, permeating slowly up my body. The heat graced miraculously to my womb and began to grow hotter and more electrifying with each ticking second.
Then when he inched lower and I felt his warm breaths tickling the tuft of curls of my womanhood, I opened my eyes thinly only to get a view that set me over the roof. Shawn's lips drifted languorously over me in an attempt to make me shiver to the delicate touch. He still managed to keep his stimulating fingers inside of me consistent. His unabated actions brought me to an apex that purloined me of thought and the fire in my gut became unbearable. The pleasure kindled a volcano inside of me that erupted, spilling hot licks of fire all over my body, making me arch so sharply I felt an ache in my back. My moans of utter desire filled up the small apartment, nearly deafening my own ears. By the time my climax had torn through me I was beyond exhausted, and Shawn's fingers slowed to measured movements before he fully pulled out of me. I caught sight of him licking his fingers while hodling my gaze, thus sending heat to flicker over my drenched womanhood. When I looked further down his arm I saw my love juices dribbling down his arm. The sight made me weak-kneed and I had to exude more pressure on his shoulders to keep myself upright.
Just when I thought I couldn't handle this anymore, just when I thought I would die from this sweet heaven, his next words showed me that there was a lot more to come.
"Mmmm...you taste so good babygirl..." I heard him say, still in a state of torpor, trying to come down from heaven to earth.
Nearly toppling over him, Shawn held my hips firmly and looked at me as he kissed his way down to my aching lips which still throbbed deliciously from his fingers.
"Shawn..." I moaned when the heat of his mouth rushed warmly past my skin, making me shiver again.
"Hmm..." Shawn grunted, "...I don't think you can handle what I'm about to do to you ma..."
Before I could think about what he said my thoughts were overcome by an electrifying heat when I felt his hot wet mouth close around my clitoris.
That showed me that we were anything but close to finishing.
YOU ARE READING
Some Day One Day
FanfictionLove was never meant to be so painful. A fave story of mine by CJ