Worlds Apart - Taekook - Book 2

Chapter 295 - Tension

Jungkook left the conversation with his brother not knowing how he should feel? He hated being an ear for someone when the subject matter was something that he didn't know anything about. What was worse was that both of his brothers had chosen to discuss female related things with him and he stood by his opinion that he was the worst possible choice!

He also stood by the fact that he believed that the most sensible option was to speak to Jara because she was the only person that could answer Kyong's questions, fears, concerns or whatever else he had going on in his head. She would also be the only person who would know if she was actually pregnant and if there was anything for him to be excited or nervous about.

Jungkook conceded that perhaps he was too logical or maybe it was more difficult to see these things when you're living it? There had been several occasions in his relationship where he'd spoken to Ash or Emery and they'd looked at him like 'are you serious?' but Jungkook hadn't been able to see it quite as clearly. With hindsight, he could now see where they were coming from and when he thinks back to situations like the proposal, it should've been obvious that it wasn't going to go as planned!

Unfortunately, he could also see how his mother had manipulated him and planned everything. But where she is concerned, he isn't alone as he'd had a long conversation with Kyong about Nuri's time in Seoul and neither of them could believe that they couldn't see the signs that were right under their noses. Kyong was convinced that he was meant to have overheard the visit from Taehyung at the Signiel, fate put him there. That was the straw that broke that camel's back and he'd needed something that blunt to kick some sense into him because up until then he was pretty blinkered.

Jungkook was always mortified when he looked back at how he felt when he entered the office at university and saw his mother sitting there. He still felt some anger when he thought about the guilt that ate away at him because he'd left her sitting alone in the cafe and he hoped that one day he would feel indifferent to the memories. She'd played him like a fiddle and it had been too easy, which also angered him.

Jungkook wasn't going to let it define him or at least he was going to try. It was difficult not to overanalyse the fact that he turned his back on his husband so easily just to believe what his birth mother was telling him. That hurt to think about because if there was one truth in it all, it was that he loved Taehyung more than he'd ever loved anyone and probably ever would. When he started to doubt himself, he only had to think about the raw emotional distress he felt when he received the call from the hospital... that told him everything he needed to know because no one else mattered then. He chose to seek comfort from Marie as he frantically fought life to get to the hospital and it was her voice that calmed him enough to get him onto the bus. He may have been at the very back of the queue when parents were being given out, but now he had the best and that should be his focus.

He visited the toilet before the quest to locate his husband on this yacht. The last time he was on Euphoria for a big occasion was his own pre-wedding party. That was a great evening, even though he remembers the nausea he felt before his dance act began. He still perceived it as one of the bravest things he'd ever done. It was so personal, like an extreme example of PDA. He'd choreographed his feelings and sexual desire for his husband and shown everyone. Most of their family and friends knew how he felt about Taehyung but performing it was something else entirely.

Jungkook used to dream of being a dancer. It was the unknown back then. He watched Idols perform and admired their intensity and dedication, even if he didn't want to be an idol. He found dance tutorials on YouTube and practised in his bedroom, whilst being conscious that there was usually one of Ryan's men loitering on the other side of the door. He wasn't a fan of being the centre of attention and preferred it when the focus wasn't on him. This thought conjures the memory of the feelings of panic when the lead dancer broke his leg before the showcase performance. He will never forget how much everyone kept talking about Taehyung after that, telling him how proud he looked and how funny he was as he stood applauding like it had been a Broadway performance. Jungkook's face was red, constantly, following that. Even staff that didn't teach him, told him that it was cute! He thought he would never live it down but underneath the embarrassment, there was the furnace of love... he'd never had anyone so fiercely in his corner before.