Best Friends (A Joe Sugg Fanfiction)

Chapter Twenty-Five

EMILY'S POV

It had been several days since Oscar had been still born and the funeral was today. I brought a tight fitting black dress to wear for the funeral with some black high heels. Joe and me arranged the funeral together because I couldn't do it alone. I got into my dress and put my hair in a messy bun. I wasn't wearing any makeup because I knew that I would cry during the funeral. The black limo came to my house and I walked out and stepped in it, Joe was already inside. We drove to the church behind his coffin. I had to try and stay strong today even thought it would be hard. We arrived at the church where Jim, Tanya, Zoe and Alfie were waiting outside to give moral support. I hugged Jim and Tanya and started to cry a little bit then I hugged Zoe. I didn't know Alfie that well but I hugged him anyway. 

I got the booklet/program to show the songs and what was going to happen. We walked in and got our seats, I sat next to Joe but we never spoke to each other because it was still really awkward. The theme tune for Thomas the Tank Engine came on and Oscar's coffin was being walked down to the front. I started to cry already because I never got the chance to watch cartoons with him. I didn't even get to bring him home once. I felt Joe grab my hand and saw him mouth to me, 'it's okay' I pulled my hand away from his. Half way through the ceremony it was my turn to talk. 'Hello, now Oscar I didn't have time to see your eyes but I managed to hold you and kiss you good night. It's a shame that I couldn't watch cartoons with you or comfort you when you cried. I remember finding out about you and how there was a big possibility that I could die when I had you or that you would be stillborn or miscarried. Right now, I wished that I had died so that you could still live...' I started to cry, 'I remember being really excited when I was pregnant with you. It was going to be me and you against the world. You were the only thing that I had left and now you're gone...' I started to cry more. 'I'm sorry, I can't do this' I said then I ran out of the church.

I sat on a bench outside of the church crying, I looked up at the sky. Joe came and sat next to me he pulled my head onto his shoulder and I cried into his shoulder for a while. 'It's okay, you're not alone' he whispered to me and I looked up and he pulled me in for a kiss which I returned. When we did finally pull away I whispered, 'I love you. I always have' then a tear came down my face then he shushed me because I started to cry. He pulled me onto his lap and kissed me again. 'I love you too. You mean the world to me' he whispered to me, 'I'm sorry I was shitty through the pregnancy and I was a shitty boyfriend but I love you so so much' he started to cry. I spotted Jim walk out of the church and look at us but he just smiled and walked back inside. 'Be with me again Em and I promise you I will never hurt you like that again. I hated and still do hate myself for doing that. I was a fool. I love you and only you!' he had tears coming down his cheeks so I grabbed behind his neck and pulled him into me to kiss him once again. 

I'm so glad he's back in my arms again.