Tell Her That I Need Her (An Ed Sheeran Fan Fiction) (Paused)

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Ed’s POV

I straightened the tie I had on, staring at myself in the mirror. I hadn’t slept in three days, my mind wouldn’t let me. My eyes fell on the body sitting on my bed. I started to tear up thinking about how Charlotte reacted after she found out the things I neglected to tell her. I couldn’t sleep because I felt guilty for not telling her it was Steven, not informing her about the baby and not letting her know what Will had said about her. She couldn’t sleep because she was physically restless. Most nights we’d lie cuddled up into my bed, her head resting against my chest, and just listen to each other breathe. Words weren’t really exchanged between us anymore.

Most of my fans had tried to comfort me with tweets, presents, videos, and pictures, but I couldn’t do anything for them because I felt helpless. My girlfriend had fallen into a state of depression, her sister still hadn’t spoken, Lewis was going insane because Chelsea wouldn’t communicate and I missed my best mate. The whole thing was topped off when I escorted Rach to her doctor’s appointment. She cried so hard in my arms when we found out that it was a boy.

James, Lewis and Chelsea appeared at my door all dressed up, “Teddy, are you ready to go?” I nodded and looked towards Charlotte. She stood up, lacing her hand with mine. She hadn’t eaten but I couldn’t force her. A fight would only drag her deeper.

Charlotte paused as we got outside, “I’m sorry Teddy. This is my fault.” I was startled by the sound of her voice; she hadn’t spoken in three days and her voice was raspy.

I dropped her hand and cupped her face, “Listen Char. It’s not your fault. Steven did this because he’s not right. William would want you to blame yourself, alright? ” She let out a small yes as I wiped tears away with my thumbs. I wrapped my arm around her shoulder, pulling her into my body and walked to the car. The car ride to the funeral home was silent, all of us not ready for our last view of William.

The car park was full as we got to the funeral home. All of our friends were coming up to Charlotte, hugging her and apologizing for her loss. My mother and father stood next to William’s parents, my mum trying to hold Mrs. Middleton together. Chelsea tried staying strong, her body pressed into Lewis’ the whole time. Anytime someone would come up Lewis would have to inform them that touching her wasn’t a good idea. She had become much more reserved and fearful. Niall was standing next to Rach as she talked to people. Brandon and Tony were sitting in the front row, Tony’s head leaning against Brandon’s shoulder.

Rach walked over to the casket, looking down at the man she loved. The one person she gave her heart and soul to. He gave his to her, treating her like she deserved no matter what happened in their relationship. Charlotte saw her and pulled me over to comfort Rach. Will looked like a porcelain version of himself, and looking down at him seemed surreal. “Will, if you can hear me wherever you are just know that I loved you more than anything. You were the only guy for me and no matter what you will always be the love of my life. I promise that one day I’ll join you. We found out that our baby is a boy. I promise that I’ll take care of Alexander and make sure he knows how amazing his father was. I just wish you were there to show him how amazing you were. We could’ve made an amazing family. Lewis told me about what you wanted to do on our 5 year anniversary.” She had started to cry, tears falling from her eyes and landing on his suit, “I would have said yes, you know. There wouldn’t have been any hesitation. I just wish that things went differently.” I felt people staring at the three of us, “This is for you,” She slid the ultrasound picture into his pocket. “I love you Will and I’m so sorry.” She leaned down, kissing him gently on the lips.

Charlotte had kissed Will on the cheek earlier and told me that it made her realize he wasn’t coming back. The same could be said for Rachel. As soon as she pulled away Niall was there, his arms wrapping around her as she cried. I stared down at the guy I called my best mate, every  memory flashing through my head.