"Recovery..."

Chapter 4 - "Officer Madden..."

Chapter 4 - "Officer Madden..."

'Are you sure you want to do this? We can get someone else in to do this' Rory said concerned, as John stared at the glass and saw Clara's lifeless body on the table.

'We don't have time to call another surgeon. She's bleeding faster than we can keep control of' John confirmed washing his hands as someone pushed the scrubs on him.

'But John--'

'I know. It's been a while. But I can do this' John nodded, placing the rubber gloves on his hands and stepped into theatre 1 followed closely by Rory.

It had been two months since the last time John had stepped into theatre 1.

The theatre where he watched a child die.

And John hadn't handled it well. If he hadn't missed the fact that she was struggling for breath then he could have saved her. He could have done something about it.

He blamed himself entirely for her death - vowing not to step back into theatre until he was completely ready and unless he was completely sure he could do this - and right now he didn't feel like he was either of them things.

But something about this woman laying on his operating table - having clearly just been stabbed half to her death - it made John want to help. 

Especially when the cause of this had just died in the opposite room - it made John want to get Clara through it. She's a victim in all this and should see the light of day again.

'John?' Rory said pulling him out of his daze.

'What?'

'Her Sats are dropping, her pulse is pretty weak. You have to do this now' Rory said handing John the scalpel arhat he would need.

John swallowed and took a large intake of breath, looking down and taking the scalpel out of Rory's hand.

He shakily held it and handed it back to Rory stepping away from the table. 'John?' Rory panicked.

'No. We get the knife out. Then we open her up' John instructed, stepping forward again and getting someone to pull the scan up on the screen in front of him.

'Be ready yeah?' John said nodding towards Rory who was in agreement and John wrapped his hand carefully around the handle of the knife.

John wrapped his hand around the handle of the knife and gently started to pull it from her stomach.

'Poor girl. She doesn't look like the type of girl to get herself caught up in shit like this' Rory said looking at her head.

'Could you just shut up a minute? I need to do this carefully. I don't want to cause anymore bleeding than there is' John snapped.

'Hold on stop' Rory said as John halted his movements.

'What?'

'Her sats are dropping' Rory said confused.

John shifted himself from where he was. 'She's going into VF. Why?' John demanded as they stopped what they were doing and someone placed two paddles on her chest.

'Charge to 100' Rory stuttered.

'Come on Clara. I'm not loosing another patient. Not tonight' John snapped looking at her pale face. 'Come on' he said as her body jerked but John was concerned about the movement causing the knife to move.

'Charge to 150' John demanded, looking at her lifeless body. 'I'm not loosing her. If we can get even a faint pulse then we can ventilate her' John said pulling the gloves and mask off, going to her head. 'Come on Clara' John said.