Shattered..

Chapter 40

Ashley

When I woke up next morning Justin was no longer next to me. I took a quick shower and got ready for work, then walked out of my room seeing Justin in the kitchen making breakfast. 

"Since when you know how to cook?" I asked sitting down at the counter. He turned around and smiled at me. "Since you decided to leave me." He said  putting a plate in front of me. I looked down and gagged from the smell of eggs.

"Is there something wrong?" He asked with a worried look on his face. "No, no it's just that I usually never eat breakfast this early. My body is still sleeping." I said rubbing my stomach. " This has to change, you have to eat" he said moving the food closer to me.

After our awkward talk I managed to eat some of his food and I wondered if Sarah came home last night. "Is Sarah home?" I asked looking up from my plate. "No, they stayed at the hotel for the night since this is the only time they can spend together." He said looking away from me.

I stood up and washed my plate before turning around. I studied Justin for a second in silence. Something wasn't right, he acted somehow different from last night. 

"What's wrong Justin?" I finally asked. He lifted his head towards me and sighed. "Where do we stand Ashley? I want to know whats gonna happen after today. Will you give me a chance to be with you or what?" He asked looking into my eyes and I wasn't ready to answer. I wasn't sure what I wanted.

"I love you Ash, you know that, but I can't sit here and wait for something if this word 'us' doesn't exist anymore. I want to be with you." He said and I could hear how hurt he was. All I wanted was to wrap my arms around his neck and tell him that everything is gonna be alright but I couldn't move. I just stood there looking at the ground.

He stood up and nodded his head walking out of the kitchen. My eyes watered as I watched him walking out on me.

"Wait!" I finally spoke as he was about to leave the apartment. I walked up to him and wrapped my arms around his muscular body. We stood there for a minute till he broke the silence. "Come on, I'll drive you to work."

As we walked outside paparazzi surrounded us with questions. Justin hold my hand and we walked to his car. 

"Is Jashley back together?"

"Justin, are you and Hailey  dating?"

All I could think about was that Hailey girl. Who was she and why they asked such a question about them dating. I stepped inside the car and blocked any sound of the screaming paps by covering my ears with hands. Justin started the car and we drove off in silence. 

"Can you please tell me what is going on in your head?" He asked as soon as we arrived. " I am leaving today Ashley and I want to know what is going to happen with us." 

I gulped loudly and looked at him thinking of response. "I..I need some time. I'm not asking you to wait for me, you deserve to be happy. I just need space. I want to know what's best for me, us. " I said blinking my watery eyes. Justin slide a hand across his jaw and sighed. "I'll give you as much time and space you need but don't shut me out. I need you, even if that means as a friend. I can't pretend that these feelings are gone. I love you and only you Ashley. He said as his voice cracked. Tears started to fall from my eyes as I looked at him. He was broken from inside and out. " I love you Justin and I am so sorry for doing this, but look at us...we don't belong. I can't keep up with your life. This is just too much." I said wiping my tears. "So what is this? You just told me that you needed space, I am willing to wait, and now you want to give up on us? Is that what you really want? Cuz if so, I wont stay here and listen to this. I'll be out of your life as you wanted. You wont hear from me ever again. Do you want this?" He raised his voice.