Shattered..

Chapter 41

Justin

  "Across the ocean, across the sea
Startin' to forget the way you look at me now
Over the mountains, across the sky
Need to see your face and need to look in your eyes
Through the storm and, through the clouds
Bumps on the road and upside down now
I know it's hard baby, to sleep at night
Don't you worry

Cause Everything's gonna be alright, ai-ai-ai-aight
Be alright, ai-ai-ai-aight
Through the sorrow,
And the fights
Don't you worry,
Cause everything's gonna Be Alright,ai-ai-ai-aight
Be Alright,ai-ai-ai-aight.. " 

I was on the stage preparing for my show in London tonight. Tonight was all about my old lyrics, I felt like singing some of my old records. My heart was aching, my eyes red from crying but still I managed to get on my feet because of the fans. Where would I be without them. 

  "All alone, in my room
Waiting for your phone call to come soon
And for you, oh, I would walk a thousand miles
To be in your arms
Holding my heart

Oh I, Oh I...
I Love You
And Everything's gonna Be Alright, ai-ai-ai-aight
Be Alright, ai-ai-ai-aight

Through the long nights
And the bright lights
Dont you worry
Cause Everything's gonna Be Alright, ai-ai-ai-aight
Be Alright, ai-ai-ai-aight"  

This song was made for the situation I was in. Although I wrote this song long before I met Ashley, it described our relationship perfectly. Did I say relationship? I meant the situation I'm in right now. I actually have no clue of what is going on. Ashley didn't call, she never contacted me after I left. I am still waiting for something, I'm still hoping that one day she will actually call me. I know that it's sounds stupid, but I love this girl with all my heart. I tried to call her, not once, not twice..no, I've been calling her every two hours, it always go to the voicemail. 

I am starting to think, that she made her decision, maybe she don't want me in her life and I should move on. 

  "You know that I care for you
I'll always be there for you
Promise I will stay right here, yeah
I know that you want me too
Baby we can make it through, anything
Cause everything's gonna Be Alright, ai-ai-ai-aight
Be Alright, ai-ai-ai-aight
Through the sorrow, and the fights
Dont you worry
Everything's gonna Be Alright, ai-ai-ai-aight
Be Alright, ai-ai-ai-aight

Through the sorrow, and the fights
Don't you worry
Everything's gonna Be Alright.."  

Maybe, just maybe this is for the best. I'm starting to believe every word she said when we last spoke. That we are two different people, that we aren't meant to be. If she wanted this, than it was time for me to let go. 

"Hey, are you okay there?" I heard Hailey's voice. I turned around sitting my guitar on the ground. She walked closer to me and smiled. "Yeah, I'm fine." I said and stood up from my chair. I walked on the middle of the stage and looked around. Soon this place will be crowded with thousands of screaming girls but the one girl I wanted close to me decided to push me away. 

"Justin, you have to stop this. I get it, you are hurting, but look around you, there is so many people, we love you and we hate to see you like this. You got your closure, she wont come. You have to let go and move on with your life." She said coming closer again. 

"We should go out after the show, all of us." I finally spoke. The truth is that I haven't been outside my hotel room since the day I arrived and I needed to loosen up. All I've seen is my phone screen these past 3 days. I haven't checked my twitter nor Facebook account for days. People probably think that I'm hiding or something. 

"Finally you said something useful." Hailey laughed. I smiled at her and we walked backstage where all my crew was. When I walked in my dressing room I felt that something wasn't right. People always smiled and jumped around happily but today for some reason it was a complete silence. Hailey cleared her throat and it was like all the people came to life again. Were they hiding something?