2016 April Collection

Request - Drabble Jasper Jordan (Triggering)

TW: This drabble deals with suicide. Please, be careful while reading this!

"You know too much." Alie shook her head and she stared at you. "I can't let you tell them everything about me." She showed no emotion. "You will have to kill yourself, (Y/N)."

Deep down there was a part of you that wanted to ignore the order. There was a part of you that remembered that this was not what you wanted. There was a part of you that wanted to fight, wanted to stay alive.

But that part was not strong enough.

Your head banged against the stone wall behind you and you pulled your wrists until they started bleeding.

"Stop, (Y/N)!" Jasper grabbed your shoulders and he pressed his knees to your hips while he was leaning over you. "You're hurting yourself!" He screamed, yelled, but he couldn't reach the part of you that knew that he was right either.

You kept on moving your arms and you didn't feel the pain of your wrists breaking and your shoulders dislocating. You didn't feel anything apart from the need to hurt yourself in such a way that it would kill you.

"(Y/N)!" Jasper sounded more hopeless now and he widened his eyes in panic. "(Y/N)! I don't know what Alie is telling you, but you shouldn't listen! You can't listen!" It was clear that he didn't know the right things to say.

Maybe there were no right things to say.

"Jasper! Sedate her!" Bellamy threw something towards Jasper and even though his hands were trembling Jasper caught it.

"I'm sorry, (Y/N), but I can't lose you. I won't lose you. I have nothing to live for when you're not there anymore." He put a small needle in your neck and within a second you felt how you were slowly falling asleep.

Barely hearable, but somewhere deep inside, a little voice was begging Jasper to help you, to save you.