Fears To Face

∞ Chapter 44 ∞

~ Kayley ~

This was maddening. I hadn't slept all night. My mind was in overdrive. What if I fall asleep when Rayne needs me and calls and I don't hear him? Then he is in misery and I don't even know it. What if he's in pain and I'm asleep? What if something's wrong? I need to make sure he's okay.

Those thoughts kept me pretty awake, alright.

During the passing hours I could only think of Rayne sleeping upstairs in my room, so close and still so unreachable. I couldn't sleep without his presence next to me, my hand awfully empty and cold without his skin under it. Especially after one single night already.

How could they do this to me? My parents knew how much I cared for him, how last week had almost killed Rayne and me. I rolled over for what must be the twentieth time. Ugh. The couch was hard, cold and uncomfortable. That compared to my warm bed with its soft cushions and Rayne in it just a few yards away left me horribly alone.

Rolling over again to grab my phone I checked the time. Three o'clock. I sucked in my breath. I couldn't handle another four hours without him. That was just an impossible thing to ask. It wasn't even halfway through of the night! I stood up and stuffed some cushions under the blanket I had lain under. Hopefully, it wouldn't look suspicious if for some reason they would come downstairs during the night. But on the other hand, I didn't care what they would do if they found out, I was going upstairs. No one could keep me away from Rayne right now.

Careful to not step on the creaking parts of the steps, I tiptoed up the stairs and went to my room. It was eerie quiet in the house, the walls dark, so dark my shadow was hardly visible. I opened the door very slowly and got inside. Rayne's inhalations were calm and steady, but the fact that he seemed fine didn't make me turn around. I wanted his touch, his warmth.

So I walked over to the bed and slowly crawled under the blankets. When I had settled myself on my side and looked him over in the faint moonlight I saw he slowly opened his eyes.

"Kayley, is that you?" he whispered.

"Yeah."

"What are you doing here?" he breathed as I smiled and pressed my body to his.

"I couldn't live through another minute without you. I had to feel you next to me. I can't sleep without it so I decided to come up." My voice was low, barely a whisper, but I was afraid my mom would wake up otherwise, and it wasn't like Rayne couldn't hear me.

His arm tightened around my back, but then he said, "You can't stay here."

"Yes, I can."

"Kayley," he sighed, the tone clearly displaying how much effort it cost him to tell me to go.

"Listen," I whispered while I wrapped my arm around his chest. He wore a grey shirt with a V-neck. He said he figured that was more appropriate now he was staying over. "If we keep really quiet, they won't be able to hear us. You can hear it when my dad wakes up in the morning and I'll go back downstairs, but please let me stay here for now." I paused. "Except if you don't want me here of course."

"I don't want you to go. I would never want you to go," he said, his voice small and honest.

I smiled and kissed his neck before I rested my head there. "I knew it."

He sighed. "You're impossible."

"Thanks." He kissed my hair as I grinned.

About three seconds later I fell asleep in his wonderful embrace.