Martyr's Love (GXG)

Chapter Thirty-Nine

"Bakit?" Yun ang unang salitang narinig ko mula kay Cassy. As I close the door of our apartment. Tahimik lang ang naging biyahe namin pauwi.. Walang usapan.. It was just silence.. Dead silence...

After I said those three words wala akong narinig sa kanya. After I said those three words I know may mag babago... Maraming mag babago... I want to regret why i said it.. I want to go back to that moment and stop myself from saying those words.. But I can't.. Hindi ko na mababago pa na nasabi ko sa kanya na mahal ko siya.. Hindi ko na mababago na sa ginawa ko pwedeng mawala siya.

"Matulog ka na Cassy. Your drunk." Sabi ko sa kanya. As I tried to passed her.

"Andy bakit?" Tanong niya ulit ng malapit na ako sa kanya. "Bakit ngayon mo lang sinabi?"

Huminto ako at tumingin sa kanya. "Matulog ka na.. Lasing ka.. Bukas na tayo mag usap." I said it with my plain voice.

"No!" Mahina ngunit may diin niyang pag kakasabi as she hold my arms to stop me. She look at me. Our eyes met. "Bakit ngayon mo lang sinabi?"

"Kung sinabi ko ba sayo na mahal kita sasabihin mo din ba na mahal mo ako?" I look away. I don't want her to see the pain I have "hindi naman..."

"OO!" Bigla akong napatingin sa kanya.

"Cassy.." Pangalan lang niya ang nasabi ko sa pag kagulat.

What does she meant with it?

That she love me too?

"Lasing ka lang Cassy." I told her sabay alis ng kamay niya sa braso ko. Maaring dala lang ng alak kung bakit niya nasabi yun. Baka dahil lang sa alak kaya niya sinabi yun. "So stop saying things that you might regret when you get sober. Matulog ka na."

I heard her laugh... "Sabi na eh."

Napa kunot noo akong tumingin sa kanya

"Joke mo lang yung kanina" Tapos tumawa siya Pero nakikita ko yung luha sa gilid ng mga mata niya "Lasing ka kaya sinabi mo yun. Isn't too late to laugh right?"

"Ano ba Cassy! Tama na!" Pag pigil ko sa kanya. 

"Totoo naman din ba?"

"Tinatanong mo ako kung sasabihin ko ba sayo na mahal din kita kung sinabi mo noon na mahal mo ako? Dapat pala hindi yung sagot ko."

Pakiramdam ko may kutsilyong tumusok sa puso ko..

"Pero Andy.. Tell me you love me now.. And I will tell you my answer."

Nakatingin lang ako sa kanya..

She laugh again this time i feel pain on it "I shouldn't say yes... para tuloy akong t@nga.. I forgot you have you Eunice.. Paano mo ako mahal?" Saka tinalikuran niya ako.

But hand seems to have its own mind.. Coz I grab her hand and pull her to me and kiss her. And it seems like there is a fireworks around me..butterfly on my stomac... My mind travel back to the time when we first kissed.. That dare.. But this time there is no dare.. Its just only us... But we are both drunk.. I pull away as that thought came into my mind.. then I look at her in the eyes.. Her eyes is full of emotion and I can't distinguish any from her eyes. At this moment I am expecting a slap on my face.. But it didn't happen... Instead there's a lips that crash into mine.

Her lips feels like heaven.. Her lips feel like a haven.. Feel like home... Feel like I finally found what I am looking for..

She circle her arms around me as our kiss starts to get more intense. I hold her waist so that I can pull her closer to me. Hindi ko maintindihan yung nararamdaman ko... Parang may kung anong apoy na nag liliyab sa loob ko.. I feel so hot.. nag iinit ang buo kong katawan. D@mn! I never felt this way before. Her finger starts to stoke my hair which send electricty through out my body.