Dear Crush! | A Dear Evan Hansen Fanfiction |

Love

Connor leaned forward, without a second of hesitation. His mind was not functioning properly, what with the strong sense of joy he felt when he heard Evan utter his name. He couldn't contain his excitement, as he wrapped his arms around Evan, pressing his head against his shoulders, afraid to let go.

He felt so much hope returning to him, the most happy he has felt in a very long time. He could not believe that Evan was alive and breathing in his arms. He could not believe that he could spend more time with Evan, listening to him talk about forestry, seeing him sketch adorable drawings, feeling his excited hugs every morning before classes start as if it were an unspoken ritual.

Connor just could not believe it, so he cried. He felt warms tears flowing down his cheeks, a mix between a frown and a smile on his face as he could not bare to hold back any more emotions.

Zoe, upon seeing Connor hugging Evan tightly, felt herself tear up again. She smiled to herself, feeling her tears flowing down her cheeks. She also felt so very happy for Connor, to have his lover back, and to have her own friend back.

Evan was shocked by the sudden hug, immediately as he awoken. He felt his eyes jolt open, his body being hugged back Connor quite strongly. He expected himself to question his actions, he expected himself to just hug Connor back out of surprise.

Instead, he felt his arms press against Connor's chest, abruptly pushing Connor away. Evan's breath quickened, as he felt himself lean against the strong and firm wood pressing against his back. He felt all of his emotions of despair drag him back into his skeptical nature, to doubt everything that Connor was doing.

Connor, absolutely surprised by Evan's rejection, leaned back, noticing how on edge Evan had been about Connor's presence in front of him. He scanned his body, searching for signs that allowed him to lean forward and calm him down, only to discover that Evan showed no signs of relenting his distrust.

Connor backed off.

He moved back a little, hearing the grass shuffle under him. He recognised the look of distrust. It was the same look Evan gave Connor right before he had ran off. He understood that Evan was going through his own problems, and decided that he should be careful about his next actions.

Zoe noticed that Connor had backed off, and followed. As much as Zoe hated to admit it, Connor knew how to handle others better than she ever could. He knew when was too much, which is why he could even be in the house at all. If he did not, he would have been kicked out by Larry without a second thought. She quietly followed Connor's unspoken instruction, moving away from Evan.

All that was between Connor and Evan was silence.

The quiet breeze allowing the leaves around them to dance, creating a symphony of tranquility, opposing the strong sense of tension between the two. Evan was catious of Connor, scanning him for any signs of hate and anger, only to discover neither. He held a completely calm expression, almost making Evan feel as if he was urging Evan to talk.

"So?" Evan called out, absolutely aggressive with his tone. He gave Connor a deadly tone, which only added barbed wire to the minefield that was Connor's decisions to approach this situation. He continued staring at Evan, who still sat on the grass quietly, gripping at his arm. He held a discomforting expression, as if expecting a different outcome than what he had expected.

"Y-You want to leave, don't you? Well then, leave! I don't mind!"

Connor could hear the sadness in his voice, and immediately felt his brows furrowing. He scanned Evan's face, choosing his next words carefully and changing his tone accordingly.

"I'm not going to leave you, Evan."

Evan had a sarcastic grin, thinking that Connor had been lying through his teeth. He scoffed at Connor, looking away and distrusting everything Connor could say. This troubled Connor further, as he assessed the situation and found that convincing Evan would take a long time. After all, his heart has been broken by Connor, even if it had not been intentional.