Dear Crush! | A Dear Evan Hansen Fanfiction |

Resolve

"I'll see you tomorrow?"

Connor stood in front of Evan, both standing at the doorway of the Hansens' house. Evan held onto the strap of his bag, once again feeling the nervousness cloud his mind. All he could manage was a nod.

"Alright, cool," Connor responded, suddenly bewildered by something. His hands felt as if they were suppose to be holding on to something, and yet, it wasn't there.

He realised that his hand was moving forward without his control, causing him to clench his fist, recoiling and holding onto the sash of his satchel.

"Bye, Ev."

"Bye!"

With that, Connor left.

Evan entered the house and shut the door behind him. He was exhausted, and yet incredibly delighted. He actually worked up the courage to talk to Connor, all on his own! It was such a huge step forward, especially for him. He sat down on his bed, absolutely quaking with excitement.

His expression was a grin. He found it extremely difficult to stop smiling at nothing. It was almost annoying to hear his own heart beating loudly, drumming rhythmically and quickly as he heard himself giggle.

Suddenly, he felt that he wanted to jump about, just because he was excited. Before he could even comprehend it, he felt his legs bouncing about. He felt his whole body skipping and prancing.

He willed himself to stop celebrating over his act of bravery, and his body came to a halt. He had to take in a huge breath, trying to relax. His shoulders suddenly felt like they were shivering from the excitement, now that he finally had control over his senses again. They shivered for a bit, before calming and relaxing.

Evan sighed, unable to believe that he had celebrated over such a small feat. It seemed extremely stupid that he was celebrating his ability to form a sentence. Yep, it definitely sounds stupid!

Yet, at the same time, he felt that he should not think of it as stupid. Everyone has their own targets, and the amount of effort it takes to reach that target is different. He should be celebrating. After all, it was a miracle that he had even had the guts to face Connor.

He walked over to his bed, lying down and stared at the ceiling. He felt accomplished. Now that he had taken this step forward, he finally felt as if he was able to continue forward with other goals that he has in mind. Things from his stuttering, to the tension between him and his friends.

"Speaking of friends," Evan muttered to himself, once again noticing the shadows of the windows stretching on the ceiling, "I wonder how Connor thinks of all this…"

—————

Connor bid Evan farewell, and was on his way home.

He found himself hurrying away from Evan's house at a relatively quicker pace than usual. He actually felt nervous to be around Evan, which was a strange thing to say. After walking away from the Hansen's house for about a minute, Connor felt himself relax.

Finally, the palpitations in his heart started to soften. Instead, the soft tapping of his footsteps occupied his mind, covering the soft rhythm of his hearts. His tense shoulders twitching and aching started to slowly slink down, finally allowing Connor with a piece of mind.

He lifted his right hand, allowing it to stay a few centimeters away from his face. The sun was still shining bright, hanging in the sky above him and allowing his hand to light up. His eyes scanned the hand he had seen his whole life, trying to comprehend a mystery that clouded his mind.