melted

wikihow not to fall in love with you

when you've actually looked up how to withhold your feelings, you know you're long gone.

every breath is painstakingly timed, for every breath without you in my sight is stammering staggered, you are not handsome but you are insanely good-looking, unfairly so, just tall enough and just kind enough.

and for some reason, seeing you happy means more than even the brightest smile, because yours is heartwrenching and absolute and infinite and if it cost everything to once again see that smile, the choice is unclear.

i, personally, want you to win, to get that role in the show, to score the tie-breaking point in gym, to be the model of perfection to your peers, to love and let live, to be you, who is winningly wonderful.

i, statistically, want you to lose, to learn and to grow, to cry and feel and seek for an alternative, to ask for help, to hear and be heard, to work for that trust and that balance of power, to be like me, who loves you.

when you've searched until the ends of the universe to find the same person each time within your heart, you know you've been long gone.