43. Breaking Me

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Chapter 43

     Breaking Me

Janet POV

"No, I'm sorry for letting you go" Justin said distraught.

"Letting me go ?" I asked confused.

He didn't respond but whimpered and pulled me closer to him. I could feel his tears wetting my shirt. Justin was always the strong person and seeing him break down made me sad. I know he didn't like showing weakness, but he didn't care right now. I hugged him and rubbed his back. I hope this isn't as bad as this was starting to turn.

"Justin you don't have to worry about not telling me who you were so you could be with Leah. I get it, what we had was nice but you had your mate. That love was stronger than anything we could have had at any point "I said trying not to dwell on the pain.

"No. No. No. No " he said a shaking and moved back.

" What's wrong ?" I asked worried for his distraught face.

"I can't tell you" he whispered.
"You will hate me"

Hearing him whisper that to himself I became full of nerves. Something in the pitch of his voice made me realize this was going to be horrible.

"Why?" I asked trying to keep the nerves out of my voice.

"I can't do this " he said shaking his head.

"Justin, it's okay. You can tell me anything. We're best friends " I said trying to coax him to tell me.

Looking into his eyes, I saw his inner battle. He was battling himself about something. Seeing him like this, I knew that it was something between him and his wolf. But I didn't get what got him so worked up. I couldn't hate him for not being able to be with me when he found his mate. I understood the mate bond and it was too much strong of a pull to simply ignore. Derek and the relationship we had was proof itself. I didn't feel comfortable with it at first but I slowly started seeing how I felt content.

"Jay it's ok" I whispered.

"No" he said and his eyes glowed.

"Jay that isn't nice. Give Justin his control back" I said frowning noticing his wolf out.

"No. I won't. Then you will really leave me " he whimpered.

Jay clung to me tightly like if any second I would disappear. It was weird to see Justin's wolf take over. Jay looked terrified and didn't want to let Justin tell me. I knew once Justin told me the truth,everything would turn more horrible.

"Jay don't keep things from me " I whispered.

Before my eyes Justin changed into his white wolf. Jaydon was freaking out too much and taking control of Justin wasn't good. All he kept doing was whimper and look at me with such sad eyes. I preferred a million times over him being mad than sad. Looking at him so weak and out of control made me sad. I pulled him closer and hugged his wolf. If reassurance was what he needed, then I was going to give it to him. It took Jay a hour to finally calm down and even then Jay was still close to the surface. But luckily Jay at least let him shift back to human. After Justin got dressed he pulled me into a kiss. His lips were urgent of full of need. I knew this was bad but somehow my body reacted to it. It was like I knew this feeling already, my body reacted to his touch. After a few seconds I felt him pull away, and his eyes were back to normal. Neither of us spoke. It wasn't time to speak about anything. The kiss itself was like a statement, it made me feel things that I only ever felt with Derek recently yet with Justin it came instantly. My emotions were all over the place and a headache was soon to follow. Any other normal person would have gave up already, but yet I kept continuing. Why was I continuing, that I didn't know.

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