That Boy With The Beanie

Cups of Coffee

Ashton was sat with his hands on his head, near the water cooler. He had been biting his lip, to make sure he didn't cry. His large frame lay on the plastic chair, almost like he was asleep. He was looking at the floor, trying not to drift asleep. Michael had gone to the bathroom. Probably to cry. Even though Luke and him hadn't been friends very long, they had known each other for a long time. He had been gone for a good twenty minutes. 

I sat a few seats away from Ashton. The silence intoxicated the air like it was smoke from a cigarette. My mum still hadn’t got here, and she had called a while back. I didn’t focus on this though. It was about 2am now, and I knew mum was very insistent on never driving while tired, and she would probably stop for a nap. I didn’t mind though. I was fine sat here, with Ashton. I would much rather be with Luke though.

“I’m, uh, gonna go get coffee” Ash finally spoke up. It took me a while for what Ashton said to register. I couldn’t tell what he said at first, I just saw his mouth move, and didn’t listen to what he said. “Uh, Charley? Coffee?” He repeated, and this time I took notice. I just nodded, and he did too, without saying a word to each other. Ashton stood up, and I watched his long frame leave my vision of sight.

Ashton had good fashion sense. He wore flannels often, but today he just sported a tank top. Luke told me before that he hardly felt the cold. He said he once went to play a gig at this park thing, and it was below 3 degrees, and Ash turned up shirtless. He was immune to it.

I sat alone in the room. It felt eerie sat here on my own. Like I was in the midst of a zombie apocalypse and I had given up, and was just sat here, waiting for a crowd of zombies to rampage their way in and eat me alive.

That would probably be less painful than seeing Luke come to harm. I really didn’t want that.

I sighed and slumped in my chair. My posture wasn’t number one priority right now. I closed my eyes and tried to forget that my sunshine was sat on a bed, barely breathing. I breathed in and out, like people tell you to do when you’re mad, or sad, or both. I was so mad at the driver that did this, even if he didn’t mean for this to happen at all, it was his entire fault. But the amount of sadness filling my body was unbearable. I could feel my heart beating and every time I breathed I could feel my ribcage shudder.

When I opened my eyes again, I saw Michael enter the room. His eyes were red, but he tried to cover them with his sweater paws. He must have gone to the car, grabbed a sweater from the inside, and ran back. He looked at me through his poorly eyes. I saw the pain through them. He nodded and walked to the seat next to mine. He sat and mimicked my position, sighing.

“He didn’t deserve this” He said quietly, not to me, more to himself. He closed his eyes and blinked through the tears. I had been crying on and off for the last half hour, so I was in the state he was in, too. Michael seemed like the type of guy to never cry at stuff. But he let his fragile tears fall, wiping them with his sweater. “I don’t cry at stuff” He said, like a message to himself.

He stopped crying and sat up, resting on his knees, which were ripped, purposely. He turned to face me. “I’m not gonna ask if you’re okay because I know you’re not” He murmured, keeping our eyes locked. He thought for a minute. “I just, um, hope that you- oh who am I kidding” He let his head fall into his lap.

“It’s alright” I lied.

“I’m sorry I just-“ Michael stood up and walked off, probably to the bathroom to cry some more. I didn’t go after him, I just let him go, and waited for Ashton to come back with my coffee.

*BUZZ BUZZ*

My phone.

I slipped it out of my pocket, and clicked unlock. The brightness hit my eyes like it went through me. The room we were, I mean I was in was dark, having only the light projecting from the hall as a light source. The message was from my mum.

Hi be late bc car has popped wheel, I be soon as I can, Is Luke stable? X

I was going to reply, but I didn’t know the answer so I didn’t. I just closed my eyes again and tried to think of something else, which was nearly impossible. All I could see was Luke’s broken body on the bed. He could be dying and I wouldn’t even know.

Ashton slipped through the doors, pushing them with his ass, interrupting my thoughts. He held a bag around his arm, and two coffees in one hand, and a bar of chocolate in the other. He looked like had bought the store.

“Ashton what have you-“

“I just thought, we need to eat, so I called at the chinese a couple of blocks away, just got a couple of poppadoms and, er, stuff” He forced a smile, and so did I.

“Uh, thanks, Michael’s just-“

“I know, I, uh, saw him come out of the bathroom, and told him to just have a nap in the car, he is exhausted and, he’s, um, well he’s fragile” He whispered the last part, looking me in the eye.

Ash sat next to me, handing me my coffee, which was still warm. He rested the Chinese in between our laps. He ate a lot, I just managed a couple of poppadoms and some noodles. He really bought a lot. There was quite a lot left in the end, which he just left in the bag, saying Michael would have some when he felt better.

We sat in silence for a long time, waiting for someone to say something, but it wasn’t awkward. It was just quiet.

“What time is it?” he asked, ignoring the clock above us. I checked my phone.

“3:45”

“God, that’s late” He said, sipping the last of his coffee.

“Yeah” I didn’t know what else to say to Ash. He was usually such a positive person, I’d never seen how good he was with people. He put his arm around me, letting my head fall on his shoulder. I was so tired. I just wanted to sleep. But I couldn’t leave Luke.

No one had said anything for hours to us. Doctors just slipped in and out of the room where Luke was, not speaking to us, even when we tried to ask them something. Like we were in another dimension.