Desire | Shawn Mendes

FIFTY THREE

Song of the Chapter: 26 - Paramore

"Reality will break your heart / Survival will not be the hardest part. / It's keeping all your hopes alive / All the rest of you has died / So let it break your heart..."

- j -

"Alright," Shawn says as he walks in the door, "I've got your food, I've got the grape juice, and take this because I've got to pee!"

He places the bags on the coffee table before placing a quick kiss at my head and rushing over to the bathroom. I grab the remote and adjust the volume higher as I prepare to watch Shawn's interview with a new host, Heath Heidi. Shawn comes out the bathroom as he shakes the water off his hands before walking over to the couch just in time for his interview to come on.

"Oh, it's on!" I say while digging into my chilaquiles.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome my next guest, he is a very terrifying man who could kill you with his weapon hands, but don't forget that he is a classic Canadian afraid of road rage. Please welcome, heavyweight boxing champion of the world, Shawn Mendes!" Heath Heidi says and the crowd claps while Shawn walks out, giving his usually shy, but beaming smile and a wave of his hand.

"Our kid is gonna have that smile." I say to him. "You have the most beautiful smile."

"Yeah, but yours is better." He replies.

We pay attention to the screen and I watch as they talk about the fight, and then Heath talks about the conference and plays a clip of Shawn freaking out and ready to attack his opponent.

"You are so terrifying." Heath says. "I mean, not right now. Right now you're the polite Canadian who hates road rage, but on that screen...you are terrifying!"

Shawn nods into the camera before laughing. "I'm so sorry, forgive me for laughing, but I never know how people are terrified of me."

"Yeah, you're right. They look at you and go, Eh, he could kill me with his bare hands and can bash my face in to death, he knocks peoples teeth's out their mouths, and can nearly tackle three strong security guards, I'm sure he's a nice guy." Heath says, laughing along with Shawn and the crowd.

"I only get like that when people talk about my girlfriend." Shawn says.

"Oh, so you're not with that girl you were engaged to? Wait, forgive me if I'm not allowed to talk about this or ask you this, but did you really cheat like he said?" I turn to Shawn as the question was asked and he tenses up. I look back at the screen and watch as he did the same.

"Her name is Nora, and she and I actually started out as an affair, then we became together in secret and then engaged. But I did cheat, and she and I worked through that and we decided that we would be better off as friends. She was still in love with her ex and I was still in love with mine, and we both did terrible things, and both used each other as replacements." Shawn says.

"So who is this woman you're with now?" He asks him as they show a picture of us as the carnival with Mia, but her face is blurred out for protection.

"That is the love of my life right there." Shawn says, earning a reaction from the audience. "It's so crazy how she and I ended up together again. She was the woman I was in love with for four years after we broke up."

"Four years?!" Heath asks Shawn.

"Yeah man. Four long years. I tried to find her, and I turned up in her life and she hated me, and I get it because I broke her heart, and she wanted nothing to do with me, even as a friend, but then somewhere along the line she changed her mind. But also because I was so determined to get her back. I legit would tell the universe every night to make something work, and little by little things worked out in our favor. And now that I say it out loud it sounds very stalker, but this is the love of my life right here. I found her and I was like, Uh uh, I am not letting her go again." Shawn says.