Desire | Shawn Mendes

THIRTY NINE

- Shawn's View -

Song of the Chapter: All Night - Beyoncé
"I found the truth beneath your lies / And true love never has to hide..."
- s -

- FOUR DAYS LATER -

Jasmine's flight would be arriving later on during the afternoon and then I would go and pick her up, but for now I wait for her arrival while I lounge around my condo. I sit on the couch as I have my guitar in hand and I randomly strum out old melodies I played as a kid. The melodies come to a slow stop of my fingers as I look around the room and think of all the memories that Jasmine and I shared while we were together.

There's a knock on the door and I set my guitar to the side as I get up from the couch and walk towards the sound.

"I thought I was supposed to pick you..." I stop as I see it's Nora in the doorway. "I didn't ... What are you doing here?"

"Hello, Shawn." Nora says. "Can I come in? I want to talk to you about us. Well, about you, mainly. And me."

I nod my head and step aside to let her in, then close the door. Nora stands in the middle of the room, her jacket over her hands as she held it and she looks around. It's then that I realize during our time of our affair, she was only in here once. And that was years ago.

"I forgot how this place looked." She speaks. "I almost forgot my way here."

"Do you want a water?" I ask her.

"No, thank you. Can I sit?"

"Yeah." I go and move my guitar, then place it on its stand, before I go and sit with Nora on the couch. "What's this about?" For an odd reason, I'm incredibly nervous.

"I could beat around the bush like I've been doing the past four days. Do you want me to?" She asks.

"Please do." I say; it will probably give me time to register what she's going to say.

"Do you ever just know when something isn't for you? But you still hold onto it anyways? Like when you took a toy from someone, and you kept it because you liked it, but eventually you grew out of it but still kept it for a selfish and petty reason?" She begins. I look into her brown eyes and try pierce into mine. "Humans are the most selfish species, you know. It's a good thing to be selfish in terms of loving yourself. But it's bad to be selfish just because you know you can. And the selfishness eats away at you."

"Nora, where's your ring?" I ask her. I glance at how her left hand is in a tiny fist and her ring is missing. She turns her hand over and opens it, revealing the ring in the palm. I look at her and she frowns.

"Shawn, I can't be selfish and keep you because I can. I kept you in hopes that you'll replace the hole that was Vincent. But you didn't. Because Vincent isn't a hole, he's more of a missing limb." Nora begins to tell me. "And I need to confess that these past four days I was actually with Vincent. Shawn, I don't want to marry you because I can't. I don't want to marry you because I came to my senses and I realized that I don't love you. I loved the idea of you, but I could never really love you. And I tried to fool myself several times into believing that I could, but it never worked."

"Shawn, I know you love Jasmine. And I know that there was something between you when I met her for lunch the other day. I also knew it when you were to dinner with her the other day and you lied about it to me. But I knew it before then that there was someone you were chasing after. It's her, it's always been her and I can't hold onto you anymore. You're not mine, you never were, and you never will be. You're hers. She's yours. I mean, you two are so beautiful. After four years you still want her. I'm not dumb, I know you cheated on me. It's my karma for the first time. But, I'm ending us because Vincent and I are rekindling the fire we have between us."