Carte Reviews (Closed)

Juliette:The Bastard and the Bard

Reviewed by Key Keeper Juliette Dragonrat703

Author: AlexZervos
Book Title: The Bastard and the Bard
Genre: fantasy

Cover 5/5

Your cover is beautiful. The font puts it firmly in a fantasy setting and your use of the crown visual shows that this is clearly high fantasy. The silhouettes of the two characters create a beautiful aesthetic, and the title is easily read. Excellent job.

Blurb 4/5

You give brief outlines of the characters and their goals, which works very well, and overall it's a great blurb. The first line, "In a world of Knights, Samurai and Vikings, unrest has fallen upon the lands of Portlandia," is a bit cliche. Many, many blurbs state the components of the world and then vaguely state that it's "in unrest." I would recommend having an interesting piece of dialogue or other interesting mystery, to set it apart from all the other fantasy books.

Title 5/5

By using the word "bard" you convey the kingdom-like setting of the story, and you show clearly who the focus of the story will be on. It made me want to know who the bastard and the bard were right away.

Plot 9/10

The prologue was very intense and interesting, but the "baby who will change the world" beginning is a bit cliche. Many stories start out with babies destined to unite their realm, and their parents taking them to safety. That doesn't mean it can't work, but you could try looking for other openings. That said, I really liked how you blended worldbuilding with suspense so well in the prologue, and overall it was very good. 

There's a lot of exposition in the first chapter, which is fine, but Arthur's attitudes about the word and honor could be conveyed through his actions or dialogue instead. This is optional, as the story works the way it is, but readers might learn more about him if they see his values through his actions, not through narration telling them. There could also be much less exposition about the history. It serves as an information dump which can bore readers since they haven't fully gotten attached to any of the characters or world. Try letting the plot get started a bit, or have Arthur do more, before much of the exposition. There's plenty of time to give it.

You switch points of view frequently but they all seem to tie into a larger story, and you make it work well. Multiple subplots have popped up already and they are all interesting and work for the story. It's a very intriguing political plot and I can tell you worked hard at developing it. You place mysteries and intrigue in just the right places (Dante's violent interrogation really spiced up the story when it seemed like there was no mystery) and you always make sure you bring your subplots into the larger narrative. Excellent job!

Character development 14/15

You have a large cast with many different points of view, but all are distinguishable and unique. I was never confused about character goals and felt like I understood each character. You made even the very violent and amoral characters somewhat likeable and interesting, and they help carry the plot well.

Spelling and grammar 9/10

Absolutely perfect except for a scant few cases of you using "were" instead of "was," and other similar typos. A quick grammar run-through should do the trick.

Overall 9/10

It's a great high fantasy book filled with political intrigue, murder, scandals, plots, and complex and well-developed character motivations. It's well on its way to becoming an excellent novel. 

Other comments: I loved your worldbuilding. Your banner designs, map, the names of locations, and the history revealed in your narration really show your dedication to Portlandia. It's rare to see a fantasy setting as rich as yours, and for that I applaud you.