In The Arms Of An Angel (ON HOLD)

CHAPTER 62

"RJ, wag kang mabibigla. ha. Pero what if I tell you that those things you saw in your dreams are somewhat real?" She slowly asked him.

His eyebrows knitted together in surprise and confusion at her question. His story was intended to make her feel comfortable and at ease in sharing things with him. It was his subtle way of letting her know that he thinks of her in a different light but she seemed to take it literally which puzzled him.

"What do you mean it is real? Sabi mo never pa tayo nagkakilala before...I'm pretty sure maaalala kita kung nameet na kita dati..."He asked her haltingly trying to read in her expression any sign that she is just toying with him. But all he can see is genuine concern and fear in her eyes, an indication that what she said may be true.

" Y-yes. No. I mean, yes we haven't really meet before you literally jumped on me at the mountain. But no its not just a mere dream..." She tries to explain but much as he try he can't understand what she meant. And she shows the same confused look as his. He tap her hands comfortingly.

"Would you like us to process your statement so we can clarify some things? Can you start from the beginning?" He asked her gently. He can feel her tension radiating from their clasped hands. He is feeling a different kind of tension but he is setting it aside so they can both make sense of the situation. She nodded timidly.

"When did you start having the same sort of dreams that I had?" He probed further.

"I, well, had the same sort of dreams months before we actually met...truth is I'm not sure if they are actually dreams, hallucinations or baka imagination ko lang kasi nangyari sila during times na supposedly gising ako." She started explaining.

"Can you elaborate more on that? Ano yung mga nangyari kaya naisip mo na di talaga panaginip yun?" He slowly asked further while mentally gauging her reactions and ministrations.

"Ganito kasi yun...we had this ocular inspection for a photoshoot doon sa Banahaw around four months ago. I was taking photos near the same ledge kung saan tayo nagmeet when I had an accident and supposedly fell down the ravine. But s-someone saved me. I saw his face but I fainted immediately after. Nung magising ako sabi ni Val nakita nila ako na walang malay a few feet away sa bangin pero wala akong kasama. Mula nun nararamdaman ko na lagi ang presence nya kahit nasa ibang lugar pa ako." She explained. He felt a sudden irrational ill feeling inside when she mentioned about another man saving her. He did his best to counter this feeling to remain objective about the conversation. But his 'curiosity' won over his professional demeanor.

"Kakilala mo ba yung lalaking nagligtas kamo sa iyo? And by feeling his presence everywhere, did you mean like a stalker following you around, ganun ba?" He firmly asked feeling outraged at the possibility.

"N-no! Its more like I feel he is with me but not really there physically. I can't really explain. Sorry. Alam ko Psychologist ka pero naniniwala ka ba sa guardian angels or sa soulmates? I think that's the closest I can describe the feeling..." He felt like hitting a wall with his bare fist at the idea that she is associating the term soulmate with another man. He is sorely tempted to end the conversation already and just go home.

"I'm still a devote Catholic as I am a man of science. But what does that have to do with this man who saved you? Can you be more specific?" He asked a bit morosely that Dei stared at his face with a slight frown. He inwardly told himself to get a grip of his feelings.

"RJ, kalma. Let her express her thoughts first so you can both make sense of it. Out muna ang personal mong issues, sya muna!" He thought bleakly.

"H-he appeared when I needed saving or when I simply wish him to be there. Di ko alam kung co-incidence lang pero ganun yung nangyari. Iniwasan nya ko nung simula kasi daw di ako kasama sa mission nya. Pero parang pinaglalapit talaga kami ng pagkakataon. Sinubukan namin para tignan kung may paraan para magkasama kami pero dumating yung araw na nagpaalam na sya at di na nagpakita uli. H-halos gumuho ang mundo ko nun." She narrated with a lost expression on her face that he had to fight the urge to hug her again and never let go.

"Tulog ng tulog ako nung una kasi gabi-gabi ko sya napapanaginipan bago sya nagpaalam. Nagbabaka sakali akong magkasama kami uli kahit sandali lang pero di na sya nagpakita kahit sa panaginip. Sunod naman halos di naman ako makatulog kakatry na hanapin sya sa social media, sa google, pati sa classified ads sa dyaryo at sa mga istasyon ng pulis pero wala pa rin. Para akong baliw na naghahanap sa taong ni di ko alam ang buong pangalan at nakasama lang ng sandaling panahon." Her tears finally fell and that was the last straw for him. He grabbed her close again and embraced her tightly as humanly possible, trying to blot from his memory the pain he saw in her eyes.

"Dei, I'm not sure if it is proper for me to say this kasi sandali pa lang din tayo magkakilala. Pero I want to assure you na di ko gagawin sa iyo ang ginawa nya. I want to do everything right with you. For I know deep inside you are worth it and more. Let me help you recover from this. Let me become not just your psychologist but your friend and hopefully more." He finally confessed.

"W-what did you say? I.." She stammered as she moved away gingerly from him. He tried tugging her back closer to him but she moved away again putting an almost three feet distance between them on the sofa. He felt cold without her in his arms.

"Dei, I think I like you already. I can't stay away from you anymore. Parang may kulang sa akin dati na napunan nung makilala kita. I want to take care of you, protect you, heal you. If you will just let me..." He practically begged as he saw fresh tears stain again her pretty face. What he would give to erase the doubt and frustration that she can't hold back from showing in her expressive eyes.

"RJ, wag kang mangako ng mga bagay na alam nating pareho na di natin makokontrol. Ganyan din ang pinangako nya dati. Ganyan din ang pinangako...mo." She softly added but he heard it anyway and he can't help the gasp that escaped him.

"P-pinangako...ko?! Anong ibig mong sabihin?" He demanded a little strongly that she flinched.

"RJ...may dahilan kung bakit mo napapanaginipan na magkasama tayo...may parte pa ng kwento na di ko nasasabi syo..." She said with difficulty. His heart beats erratically with her demeanor.

"Alin ang hindi mo pa sinasabi and what does that have to do with my dreams..." He started asking when a sudden realization hit him which in turn brought fresh tears to her eyes.

"Ikaw yung lalaking nakilala ko almost four months ago sa gubat...ikaw yung lalaking gusto kong kalimutan at iniiyakan ko nung una tayong nagkita sa bundok...ikaw yun...Richard." She finally confessed before she broke into sobs.

RJ heard her words but his mind refuses to acknowledge their meaning. She can't be serious. The whole thing is absurd.

But something deep inside him is telling him that she is speaking the truth. At this point the raging war inside his head became too much to take that he abruptly stood up, walked and headed purposefully towards the door.

"RJ..."

He stopped mid-step when he heard her call. RJ turned slowly towards her direction with a sad expression that he can't fully control anymore.

"You're crazy..."