Spiderman/Peter Parker & Avengers Oneshots (Hiatus)

Drowning In Darkness (TW)

Trigger warning: Please do not read if you have eating issues or are self-conscious of your body. Suicide trigger as well. If anyone needs help or support, my dms are open.

TW stands for trigger warning.

Italics is Peter's notes. Bold is his checklist for doing things. Use black paper.
"Wake up,
I'm in the Avenger's Tower as usual
Brush your teeth and change,
Go to the toilet
Don't eat breakfast,
No time
Go to school,
Another 6 hours of torture
Get tormented by Flash,
No more joy
Head to class,
Avoid everyone
Listen to things you learned before,
Boring
Don't eat lunch,
You're too fat
Go to next class,
Few more hours to go
Sit through it,
Do nothing except work
Get bullied by Flash and his gang,
Punch. Kick. Punch. Punch. Kick.
Go 'home',
Hide your injuries. Don't make them worry for a piece of trash
Go patrol,
Use it as an excuse and a way to be alone
Go back,
Stay out for too long and they will chide you
Eat dinner,
Just for the nutrition
Sleep,
Wake up in cold sweat due to nightmares
Repeat.
This is my life. I am Peter Parker. I am a 16 year old high schooler. I am trash. I am a burden. I am useless. My 'family' doesn't even notice me anymore. I'm drowning. Drowning in the darkness that has become my light. My logic. My hope. My hope that has drowned and fallen, deeper than I will ever be able to reach and pull up. I can't do anything right. I can't even let my 'family' and 'friends' be happy. I'm just a burden. Dragging them down with me. I am a waste of space. I don't deserve anything. Not the air. Not the water. Not the food. I am a menace. I am Spiderman. I let people die when I'm to lazy to patrol. I am nothing. Nothing but a piece of shit. Flash is right.
Sorry to all those who knew me.
Sorry to all those who I dragged down. Sorry I ruined your dreams and aspirations.
Sorry I was a brat.
Sorry I demanded things from you.
Sorry I damned your life.
Sorry I created a black hole.
Sorry to those I killed.
Sorry I was never enough.
Sorry I lied to you.
Sorry I never told you.
Sorry I made your life hell.
Sorry I am weak.
Sorry I wasn't there in time to save you.
Sorry I was too weak to pull my self out of the darkness.
Sorry you had to read this to find out what I am.
Sorry for everything.

Yours faithfully,
Peter Parker,
The Spider Menace                                      

"The Avengers read. Crying, they looked up at the now lifeless body of an angel called Peter Parker. The one who would light up a room just by walking in. The one whose smile was contagious. The one everyone loved and adored. Just hanging on a web made by himself.

After that, the Avengers were never the same ever again.

Tony would be locked in his lab.

Steve was cold and short tempered.

Bucky stayed in his room and go full Winter Soldier at whoever dared to enter.

Natasha become cold and distant.

Clint became serious and hardly ever cracked jokes.

Rhodey was isolated for being 'cheery' despite a death even though he was just trying to help them.

Scott stayed with Cassie and Hope at his house.

Sam became quiet and mean.

Wanda locked herself in her room.

The world crumpled without it's mighty heroes and chaos ensued.

"A world without Peter is not a world at all." Was what the Avengers would say when asked why they stopped helping and caring.

End. 576 words. (Sorry, had to do smt sad.)