Are You Satisfied? (Bakugou x Midoriya)

Hard to Love

Author's Notes: Sorry there's going to be a big time skip......we need to fast forward in time!!

Katsuki

Throughout the span of 3 months I could feel tension between us. The day after our disagreement Izuku had just brushed it off, and I was dumb enough to believe it. After the first month I began to realise it. He began to smile less, well for Izuku he smiled almost everyday all day, but if you payed attention. His laugh would die down as if nothing happened, at first I brushed it off. 

Until it got worse.

We would barely look at each other, when I tried to talk to him more he would not answer, just nod and walk away or respond with less enthusiasm. We never got to have a normal conversation after that and given that I always had to stay after school either. As time went on I began to notice bags under his pale skin, but that only increased my concern for him. I knew something was wrong, but maybe it was partly my fault. So after I finished the last of my duties I planned to clear things up and make sure he was okay. What if he had took my words and the way I expressed myself by heart? Did he just bottle it up for these past few months?

I guess I really don't know how much my words can effect someone.

I snatched a glance at Izuku, he was chatting away with Mei at something, they seemed to be having fun. Maybe too much fun. I quickly shook that thought away.

What am I thinking. 

It was a Friday and everyone was rushing to leave for the weekend. As the rest of the few classmates scurried out after the bell Izuku hurried and gathered his belongings. He sensed me walking towards him so he began to just stuff everything in his backpack instead of neatly organizing his backpack.  

"Hey," I blurted out, making sure not to sound intimidating but still confident. He didn't flinch at my voice but he froze. "Next week I'm finally free from duties, can we talk then?" I asked quieter as I said it. He resumed packing but slower now.

"What for?" He asked, I paused to think of something but his arms caught my attention. They were littered with bruises and bandages. "Kacchan?" I snapped my head back to look at him, his face was of confusion. I cleared my throat,

"Look, I feel like there's tension between us, I want to sort it out." He was about to protest but his eyes softened and he nodded his head. I had left out my other reason, I was worried for him. He didn't look the same, always tired, although I noticed he had gained more muscles and seemed less skinny. Whatever was happening made me skeptical. 

"Okay," he finally said, zipping his bag and pulling it over his shoulder. I did a celebratory fist pump in my head. "but not after school." My smile vanished. 

"Why not?"

"I'm busy after school."

"Then what days are you not?"

"Sorry, I'm busy everyday." His response was so casual, as if he didn't care that we were fighting.

"Why are you busy everyday?" I asked trying to not sound angry at his response, but he could tell. His face immediately panicked, then turned into anger than a strained tired face. 

"I'm sorry I seem so out of it, I'm really tired. Look I really care about this, I just can't do after school." He says softly pinching the bridge of his nose and squeezing his eyes shut. "I'm sorry I can't tell you why either."

I softened and nodded back.

"Okay we an talk tomorrow at lunch." I concluded and looked at him for an okay, he nodded back and smiled wearily.

"Thank you for understanding." He left with that, leaving me with only my thoughts. I waved bye to him back but thoughts in the back of my mind emerged.

He doesn't trust you with whatever he's doing.

He doesn't forgive you for what you did back then.

He found someone better.

Dark thoughts lingered as I stood still in the quiet empty class room. 

He found someone better. 

No, Izuku would never do that. He would have broken up with me instead of cheating on me. Right? I wanted it to be the truth, I wanted to believe that all was well. That we would be the perfect couple forever, but the truth......truthfully I didn't know.

I want to believe that everything will be okay.

Izuku

I was really in a hurry, I had to meet up with All Might soon so I quickly packed my bag when the bell rang. The first weeks of training were brutal but I didn't give up, not then, not ever. It's been about 3 months and even though I've grown and have become stronger there's still so much I haven't done. This was my time to show who I wanted to be, a hero. I barely got much sleep and even if I did I was still tired, so it was hard to concentrate. Earning a few bruises here and there from the desperately trying to clear the beach of garbage. I tried my best to cover them up, how long will I have to do this in hiding? I could sense that Kacchan was concerned, who wouldn't? But I just couldn't tell him, I promised.

When Kacchan asked me to meet up next week after school to talk I couldn't tell him yes, I needed to train with All might, but I couldn't tell him the reason either. So I asked why and he said that he felt we were drifting apart. I didn't realize until that moment how hard it was for Kacchan to see me this way, even though he didn't know the reason for it I knew he knew that I was tired and not taking good care of myself. Was I avoiding him?

Yes I was peeved at him constantly thinking I am in need of help...maybe I was avoiding him.

What for?

I wasn't so sure myself.

Maybe part of me didn't want to face him. For not being able to tell him anything.

I don't know. I'm thinking too much about this right now.

I glanced at his face, he was worried, worried that this would be something that was pulling our relationship apart. I immediately didn't want him to think that so I smiled and agreed to meet to talk, just not after school.

His gleaming face vanished, he asked why but I told him to trust me. It was getting late and I didn't want All Might to be waiting so I reluctantly headed out and thanked him.

Not knowing what would happen when I left him there, in that empty classroom.

Katsuki

Something was definitely wrong.

He admitted he was tired instead of brushing it off, the bruises and bandages on his arms.......were they apart of this too? There still was so much that was unclear to me. He didn't seem angry when he talked to me....just tired, but the reason was still unknown. 

There was so much clouding my mind I hadn't realised that I had arrived home until the old hag yelled at me to come inside.

"Are you okay Katsuki?" She asked me, I could tell she was genuinely worried. 

"What? No-I mean yes, I'm fine." I grumbled and headed upstairs to the bathroom. I ran the cold water and soaked my hands, then cupping them into a bowl shape and splashing the water against my face. I placed my hands on either sides of the counter and leaned against the counter, staring intently at my reflection.

Was it me?

Am I the reason Izuku is acting differently?

It made sense, of course. He hated how I didn't want him to be in danger, he hated how I cared so much.

He....hated....how I cared....

"I can handle myself Kacchan."

"Stop worrying about me."

So why should I?

Author's notes: Thanks for reading!