The Joker x Reader Imagines 💚

The Memo

You are sick of seeing the girls working at the club trying to flirt with J. I mean, this crap needs to stop like... this instant. You stayed up all night and came up with some rules.

Finally done. You email your memo to all the parties involved and CC the Joker too. You didn't even close your eyes for 5 minutes, and now you have to go to an early business meeting with Frost. J doesn't have to be there so he's sleeping in.

***********

Mister J woke up a little bit ago and he decides to take a look on his laptop and see if he has any new messages. He brings his coffee with him and sits down at his desk. Messenger's voice lets him know:

"One new message from: Daddy'sNauthyPrincess. "

"Oh, goody." His face lights up with a pleased grin: you always send him dirty pics when you are away for a few hours. The Joker clicks on the pop-up bubble and instead of some naked shots he sees a bunch of writing. He has to bring the laptop closer to his eyes because he doesn't have his contacts in. J thinks he doesn't really need contacts. Yeah...whatever!

"What's this?" he wonders, beginning to read.

Since you guys are really starting to cross the line, I wanted to remind you Mister J is mine. His sexy ass belongs only to me. Period. (I shouldn't spell "period" but it's emphasizing what I am trying to say.) Here's how it is:

J snorts. This is so...you.

1. Stop trying to flirt with my Puddin and keep your greasy little mutant hands away from him. I mean, I know your hands are not really greasy, but that's not the point.

2. The other day I heard one of you calling him Daddy. I was talking to Frosty but I'm not deaf. Don't even dream about opening your mouths to utter that word again, ever (unless you're talking about your own dad, in which case you can say it.) I'm the only one that can call him Daddy when he rides me.

The Joker is drinking coffee and spits it out all over the place when he gets to this. He starts coughing, then a maniacal laughter resonates in the penthouse. He doesn't remember the last time he laughed so hard. You must be really worked up about the whole situation to come up with this memo. J knows than when it comes to him, you lose it and you can't think straight anymore. Back to reading, still laughing.

3. I heard rumors that some of you want to get the same "Property of Joker "tattoo as I have. Get the idea out of your heads. This tattoo is not for insignificant little peasant bitches such as yourselves.

"This is gold!" Mister J snickers, pleased with your work so far. He didn't even finish and he thinks it's the best thing he read all year. The funniest, for sure. "Good old Frosty should see this masterpiece." He forwards it to Frost, then continues.

4. Don't try to sit in his lap anymore. Even if I'm not present, that's my spot. I don't go and sit on your dad's lap now, do I ?! The nerve you guys have... Completely ridiculous!

5. Stop winking and batter your stupid eyelashes at him. (-unless you have something in your eye or your contacts scratch your retina, in which case it's somewhat acceptable, I guess. But try to control it.)

The Joker's cell goes off. Message from:

Frost: "Sir????" 😳

J texts back: "I know, my Princess can be so...intense. 😏 It's not her fault she loves me so much. How are things over there?"

Frost:" She's still inside, sir. Me and the boys are securing the perimeter. Last time I went in, she got us 1 million over the starting price. She might get more by the end of the meeting."

J : "That's my girl. 😬 Frosty, spare no expense: order her favorite red roses; I want the penthouse full of them. Get her some diamond jewelry too, like, a box full."

Frost: "On it, sir."

Mister J turns off his cell and reads the last part of your memo. My God, it's been entertaining as hell. Who would have known you're such a good... writer?

6. Don't make eye contact with my Puddin for more than 7 seconds, I'm gonna time you. You don't need to stare at him; you know how he looks like. I mean, if he has a new outfit or something, I'll will be generous and say you can gaze at him for maybe 10 seconds. But that's it, don't push it, hoes!

7. Tonight we're still on for our girls night out, the movie and the dinner and whatever else we planned last week. See you guys at 10pm.

Wow, that was a trip. The Joker believes he has a new fondness for you. He licks his silver teeth, big smile on his face.

"My girl is gonna win a Pulitzer for this," he snickers, getting ready to text you.