Started With A Dare

thirty eight

Tzuyu's POV

Today, Jungkook texted Dahyun's phone.

Just a while ago, Dahyun came busting in my room as I was writing something. I quickly hid my writings and unfolded my long sleeves, I had to...

DH: I told you lover girl! He does have a crush on you!!!

TY: U-Unnie... Don't be ridiculous... Never would he-

DH: Look!

She put the screen right in front of my face... Well, Jungkook did text her.

TY: Unnie, he's just doing a follow up on how we're doing. I cannot see the word crush anywhere...

DH: Tzuyu, you naive girl. It is very very clear that he likes you... Why can't you just take the hint?!

TY: Hmm... Whatever Unnie...

DH: Okie, ill leave you two to your business. Give it back to me when you're done!

TY: Sure, sure...

Dahyun Unnie left the room with a suspicious smile on her face. Of course that was her teasing face, she had raised eyebrows and a weird huge grin stuck on her face.

The other members said that she has really cute expressions, they also think that boys like those kinds of cute and funny faces. I somehow am not able to do it.

Dahyun unnie's aegyo in her facial expressions are completely natural and are not on purpose. We all know this really, it's some kind of cute habit of hers to make faces that are unintentionally cute.

Enough about Unnie...

I unfolded my sleeves and went straight to the bathroom. I let the tap water run, i let it run over my arm. The tap water was getting mixed with blood and so the result was clearish red water.

I continued to let it run over my arm so that i couldn't feel the pain anymore. This wasn't the first time I had cut myself... It all started way back in high school, I was being bullied.

Taiwan is kind of a place where skin discrimination is a huge and popular thing. Sure, I had a beautiful face, but my skin was a dark complexion.

I didn't hate being dark, I hated being judged because I had dark skin. My classmates treated me like I had some kind of skin disease even if I was loaded and my parents were really concerned.

I thought of it all as a joke during my elementary days, but dang, high-school was a tough completion. It was somewhat a competition for beauty, hair styles, and skin quality.

I envied the lighter toned ones, I thought of myself as ugly at the time. I couldn't believe that I was actually absorbing whatever these people said to me, I was way stupid back then...

There was a time in high school where I've confessed to a boy, but he rejected me. Soon, rumours were in the air. I guess the boy I've confessed to somehow found it funny and decided to spread the thing to the whole school.

Well, as we all know, rumours start from a tiny seed. Whatever the boy said must not have been such a huge deal right? It was just a girl who liked him... Right?

Well, the people who've heard the news decided to change the story line a bit and made their own plot. Dang, they should be authors someday. And as soon as I knew it, everyone was talking about me.

Everyone was talking about of how I forced a kiss with the boy I've confessed to, or of how I've been caught stalking him a few times already, or of how I threw a tantrum and threatened to kill him if he did not go out with me.

Girls started calling me all kinds of rude things, things that I would never use, I would especially never use to describe myself or anyone actually...

During high school, I knew that life had disappointed me and did not reach any of my expectations of what I thought it would be when I have reached this age...

My high school life had affected me in the past and it also affected my future. I am scared to be attracted to someone, well... Not really, but I mean, I am very scared of confessions...

And it was around that time of my life where I've discovered the world of depression and self harming. I would cut myself every time someone would call me something rude.

Of course, no one knew about it... I didn't scar my arms or my wrist... I scarred my palms.

I wanted to have an excuse to not write, I wanted to have an excuse to not got o school anymore. I wanted to get away, away from everyone, away from everything, away from this place.

The scars on my palms weren't as visible anymore it had gradually healed and only a few marks can be traced from it.

But scarring my palms didn't get me anywhere. It actually made me so scared, I couldn't dare show it to my parents, they'd freak out and sent me to some kind of therapist.

I ended up not showing anyone, the torments kept on going.. I just let them be and hoped that it would eventually die down. Well, it didn't die down. The rumours have died down but the truth still wasn't revealed, and all those nicknames were stuck to me... So we're my scars.

I was also in a dancing studio during that time, my parents forced me to do some classes. So when I got sent to audition for the survival show, sixteen, I was so happy and grateful.

I could finally live happier and freeier. I can stay away from my family and all my old classmates, I can finally live. But little did I know, it was way harder as an idol.

I've suffered lots as a trainee, being almost excluded from the group. If I didn't get into Twice, it means I had to go back to my awfully painful life back in Taiwan... I should be thankful at least.

(shout out to ONcESONYEONDAN because I'm very grateful for having a reader like you! Thank you :))