Denial - a Breddy fanfic

1.

The late afternoon sun etched it's way through the gap between the curtains of Brett's bedroom. This normally wouldn't be a problem for him, as he would usually be awake by now. He placed the pillow over his head and let out a groan. What did he do to make the sun hate him? The blanket felt like it was made of lead, weighing the otherwise productive violinist down. He should have been practicing by now. Or well, actually he should have been finished practicing by now, because it was now only fifteen minutes until his best friend would come over with today's take away dinner. He smiled slightly at the thought of dinner.
Brett wasn't really sure why he didn't feel like practicing today. Maybe he was just tired? He had no real reason to be that tired though. Not this time, anyway. Sometimes he'd lie in bed and chat with Eddy on facebook all night about everything and nothing. Stuff like what makes Stradivarius superior or if they accidentally had created a new religion when they made up Ling Ling.
Sometimes they discussed personal problems. Or well, mostly Eddy's personal problems as Brett claimed he had none. The latest of Eddy's problems they discussed was this girl they had taken a picture with while on tour, who Eddy appearently seemed to take interest in. Brett, for some reason, didn't like talking about that. It annoyed him, and he stayed away from the topic if he could. It made his stomach feel like it was turning inside out.

There was a knock on the front door, and Brett immediately knew who it was just from the sound of the knock. It was one light peck before he tried the door handle to let himself in. They had stopped waiting for the other one to open years ago, but still did the symbolic knock. Then Brett listened for the thump of his sneakers on the shoe rack. He had his own spot on the shoe rack, even though he didn't actually live there. It just made sense, you know? 
He crawled himself out of bed and put on a pair of jeans he had lying around on the floor next to his bed while listening to the sound of Eddy entering his home.
"Hey bro!" he heard from the taller boy along with the distinct sound of his light steps into the living room.
"Food delivery for Mr. Yang! You alive, mate?" Eddy asked from the other side of the house.
"Mhm", Brett replied as he made his way to the living room with heavy steps sporting his usual deadpan face.

"Man, you look chewed up! Did you just wake up?" Eddy asked with a half-joking smile. Brett just grunted out a sleepy "Mhm" before grabbing his order from the plastic bag on the table. He dumped into the other end of the couch Eddy already was sitting in. They both started to eat in comfortable silence as usual, but Brett's mind kept making up stupid stuff that made him somewhat uncomfortable. It was mostly about Eddy.
How is it possible to eat so sloppily and still look so incredibly good?
Brett bit his tongue on purpose as the thought was forming. Stupid brain. His stomach made a twist, which caused him to shake his head slighly to make it go away, and of course Eddy noticed the small movement.
"Something wrong, bro?" he asked, looking at his slighly older friend while trying to hide how much he worried about his older duet partner. "Did the shop mess up your order again?" Eddy wasn't really asking about the order, though.
"Nah, all good" Brett replied, as usual, and Eddy knew the battle was lost. When Yang had decided not to talk about something, he was not talking about it. End of story.

The house felt empty as it always did after Eddy left. Brett's brain started bothering him again, because there was no longer distraction to keep busy. Brett would often joke with Eddy that he was the perfect distraction from practicing, but he really also was the perfect distraction from himself. After Eddy left, all of Brett's energy went with him. He was still on the couch he had sat down in hours before, but it felt unwelcome without Eddy there. Still he couldn't make himself get up.
At some point he had gone from sitting to lying down on the couch. He couldn't remember when that happened. He took off his glasses and put them on the coffee table next to the empty take away boxes.
You lazy scum, clean up the boxes already.
The image of Eddy's sloppy eating sneaked into his brain and the stomach knot tightened. He curled up and held tightly around his legs
"Leave me alone", he mumbled out loud to himself, feeling the tears pressing on. "It's not like that, stop."

He spent the night like this, and eventually fell asleep. The stomach knot never let go, though. He called it a knot, as if it was a pain. It felt more like butterflies, most of the time, whenever Eddy was around. Not in a gay way though. He just cared about his best friend, that's all. No gay people here, no sir. Besides, even if he was, then Eddy probably wasn't. Maybe bi, but he was definitly into girl judging from how he spoke about that fan they had met. With her stupid jokes that made Eddy laugh so dearly...
He could never admit how it made him feel.