Denial - a Breddy fanfic

28. (nsfw)

//semi not for work probably//

Eddy saw the sparkle in Brett's eyes when they locked onto his, a sparkle he hadn't seen since the last time they had been intimate. Brett loved how his lips curved into a smile, a teasing one. He spent some time studying him, his bo...
He has never called you his boyfriend. He's just playing with you.
His friend.
Unfortunately, Eddy, after waiting for this opportunity for the past weeks, was not patient enough for Brett's brain to argue. He took advantage of the loading process in Brett's brain, and rolled them over so he could be on top of him.

"Ouf shit man", Brett exclaimed with a tiny smile, feeling Eddy's weight hold him down. "Impatient with me?"
"I've waited for weeks, Brett, I don't have time for your brain to process. Just feel it Brett, or stop me if you don't want to", Eddy whispered before leaning down to Brett and let his lips brush over Brett's. They moved slowly, but their breathing accelerated as if they were stressing on stage. Eddy felt a soft hand on his neck, pulling him closer to the gasping man beneath him. Then he felt the other of Brett's hands slide up his thigh before coming to a rest at his hips. This made him shiver with excitement. It had been too long, and Eddy thought they really didn't do this often enough. At least not often enough compared to how often Eddy wanted this to happen.

He's just using you, Brett.

Brett attempted to shove his stupid brain aside to enjoy the moment. Eddy was right about it being weeks since last, and mostly his brain was at fault for that. His brain and his lack of energy to do anything, really.
He felt Eddy move his hands to pull off Brett's hoodie, and he let him. The chilly air of the hotel room hit his bare chest, causing him to shiver slightly. Then Eddy slowly removed the pink hoodie and the t-shirt he was wearing and leaned down to kiss Brett again.

He doesn't love you the way you love him, stupid. Actually, he doesn't actually love you at all. Just using you for this. 'I've waited for weeks', remember? He's just after this.

When Eddy pulled away from the kiss, he knew Brett's mind wasn't with them anymore. He felt Brett's mental absence in the way he moved, and it made him unsure of what to do. He got off from sitting on top of Brett, who was still absolutely gorgeous with his bare torso. Brett followed him with his eyes, also not sure what to do.
"I'm sorry", Eddy said quietly after a while. They were lying close together in bed, but none of them actually taking initiative to be affectionate with the other, even though Eddy longed for it. 
"Don't be", Brett mumbled back. "It was nice." It had been nice, that wasn't a lie. His body had wanted this so bad, and it still did. His brain, on the other hand, seemed to think this was a bad idea. Brett thought there was a significant chance it was right, and went with it when Eddy stopped. 
Eddy sighed, sat up, and got his t-shirt back on. He didn't notice Brett's eyes on his back muscles as he did so. "It doesn't feel like you want this, Brett. It feels like I'm forcing you. I don't want to force you."
"You're not forcing me, I want you. I just... it's just... you know?" Brett knew he wasn't making sense in the last part there, but he didn't know how to explain to this absolutely gorgeous and fantastic man he didn't actually feel anything at all, towards anything, for the most part. 
"Sure", Eddy said with a defeated tone to his voice before getting up and moving over to one of the two armchairs in the room. His body was still screaming for Brett's touch, but his mind had been put off by Brett's lack of mental initiative.

Eddy curled up in the chair which was turned towards the single window in their room. He could see planes take off and land a bit in the distance. It was beginning to get dark, and he felt himself go dark mentally as well. Brett insisted he trusted him, insisted that was not the problem. Then what was it that caused him to not want to touch him? Wasn't he physically attracted to him anymore? Had he done something wrong the last time? Maybe he wasn't good enough for Brett, in the physical sense?