Denial - a Breddy fanfic

163.

It was so quiet. The silence stressed him out. He has tried to remove the silence by practicing, people ignoring the neighbouring patients despite having a practice mute on. It was three in the morning after all.

He only stopped practicing when the night nurse asked him to before going off shift around five in the morning. She had told him to get some sleep several times during the night, but h3 couldn't deal with the silence. His wrist hurt, his back was stiff and his hand was cramping up. Only four more hours left before breakfast and another pill. He didn't want another pill.

The silence was in many ways worse than the voice. He found himself doubting every little movement. What was okay to do? How was he supposed to know?

His eyes were watering from the sleepiness, his body aching for some rest. He couldn't sleep. Sleeping would mean staying still long enough to listen to how empty his head was. He couldn't deal with it.

At six he called Eddy. Eddy had said he could call any time, and he needed some distraction. Anything to keep his mind busy. He sat down on the edge of his bed, trying to figure out what note the beeping of his phone was before Eddy picked up. He thought it possibly was a B flat.

"Hey love," Eddy yawned in the other end. Brett almost cried at the sound of his voice. "Are you okay? It's pretty early.."
Brett rubbed his eyes, not knowing what to say really.
"I... I just needed to... To hear your voice..." he half whispered back, unable to really make his voice work for him. He wrapped his other arm around himself.
"Well, here it is," Eddy said with a tiny chuckle. "And you'll hear it later today, too. I'm coming at ten, remember?"
"I know... I'm sorry, I probably shouldn't have called. You need sleep. Of course you do. God, I'm so stupid."

Brett rubbed his teary eyes again, feeling like an idiot. It wasn't acceptable to call people at five in the morning, and especially not Eddy when he knew Eddy needed sleep. Least of all when he knew he'd see him in just four hours. It was stupid, and the voice would have warned him. The silence didn't help him.

"No, it's fine. Waking up to your voice is worth it," Eddy said, still sounding slightly hoarse from just waking up. "Why are you up so warly, though?"
Brett crawled more properly into bed, pulling the duvet over him. Eddy's voice was soothing, and made it easier for him to allow himself some comfort.

"Just... uh... woke up early, I guess," Brett lied, and he could hear Eddy's sigh through the phone. He knew Eddy had caught him lying, and curled as if he was scared of getting yelled at. Normally he would be by the voice.
"You sure you don't want to sleep the last few hours before breakfast, then?" Eddy suggested as if he hadn't caught the lie. "You need your sleep too, you know."

Brett didn't realize he had laid down, but when he did he put on speakerphone and placed his phone on the mattress next to him.
"No, no. Please, keep talking," he mumbled, followed by a yawn. "I'm fine, not really tired." His eyes kept falling closed, and he took his glasses off to be able to lie on his side more comfortably.

"What do you want me to talk about, then?" Eddy said, realizing what was happening in the other end. Brett yawned again.
Brett gave it some thought.
"What kind of flowers do you want for the wedding?"

Eddy kept talking about the wedding, not hanging up until he heard light snoring in the other end. He looked at the time, realizing it was time to get up anyway and rolled heavily out of bed.