Denial - a Breddy fanfic

48.

The rehearsal went fine for once. Brett had gone back to his flat emotional state, but it didn't prevent him from playing okay. In a way, it helped him, as he was able to focus completely on the music and not on his three billion other thoughts. Most of his extra energy was spent keeping Eddy afloat through the day, as he had been near a new breakdown that morning. Brett hadn't known what else to do other than hold him and telling him he'd be there, and that he'd protect him if he was nearby. Brett knew that if Chris was around, he very likely wouldn't be as brave as he wanted Eddy to think he was.
Eddy's arm still hurt, causing his movements to be a bit stiff and therefore his playing a bit off. It got to him that he let the thing with Chris affect his professional life, but he couldn't help it. He tried to lie to himself, saying he played bad because it physically hurt, but mentally he wasn't really there either. He looked forward to seeing some of the sights around town with Brett and Victoria, to get his mind onto something else, someone else.

During the break he decided to let Brett know about the plans as well, as he hadn't even thought of telling him yet. He just assumed he'd come like he always had while they were on tour. They were sitting in one end each of the large leather couch in their wardrobe, sipping a coffee each, trying very hard to seem like friends and not as boyf... uh... lovers?
"Hey, Brett?" he asked while sipping the way too hot coffee from the styrofoam cup. The coffee stung on the healing cut on his lip.
"Yeah?" Brett's voice was as dead as the deadpan face he was sporting. He hadn't bothered to do much about his hair that morning, and Eddy still recognized it as the hairdo made by their... intimate session.
"Victoria has invited us to see a famous place here in Bergen today. Wanna come?" Eddy kind of already felt he knew Brett would say yes, and was shocked when that wasn't the case.
"I'm sorry, Eddy, I'm not feeling to great today. Unless you need me there, of course." He added that last bit, because he knew there was a chance Eddy wouldn't feel great about going with him not being there.
"Oh", was all Eddy said for a while, feeling his heart sink down into his stomach with disappointment. He had really wanted to share that experience with him, but he couldn't exactly make him go either.
"If you don't need me there?" Brett asked, eyeing up Eddy's disappointed face. Eddy shook his head.
"No, no... it's fine, I'll have Victoria there, but... maybe you could... be available... like on the phone? If I... change my mind?" He looked down into his now lukewarm cup of coffee. He was embarrassed to be so dependant on him.
Brett nodded. "Sure, if it'll make you feel safe." The rest of the break was quiet except for the occational slurping of some coffee or humming of that one catchy part of the new piece.

After rehearsal ended Eddy watched Brett leave the concert hall without him as he waited for Victoria. His heart sped up slightly, knowing he was completely alone in the large now. He knew Chris went to school just by the concert hall, and it felt awful to know he could be just around any corner.
He almost jumped three meters straight up when he felt a light tap on his bruised arm, breathing in harshly. It was both because he was surprised, but also because it still hurt to touch it.
"Oh shit, sorry! I didn't mean to scare you!" Victoria said apologetically in her slight Norwegian accent. Eddy tried to breathe to calm his heartrate again.
"No no, it's fine... I'm just so easily scared, you know..." he tried to lie, but he didn't feel like the lie was well hidden. Victoria either didn't catch him lying, or at least didn't call him out on it.
"Brett isn't coming?" she asked, and Eddy shook his head.
"Nah, he isn't feeling great, appearently."
"Shame, he's such a cutie" Victoria said, followed by a laugh and Eddy laughed with her, even though he didn't particularily like that anyone else called Brett a cutie.
"Let's go then?" she suggested and the two of them went out the door of Grieghallen.