Denial - a Breddy fanfic

135.

It was soon clear to Brett that having a nice day wasn't something he could do. The conversation they had made his brain start up and throughout the day it would remind him how Eddy felt about himself and definitely how that was Brett's fault while also shooting in a few reminders of how it actually was the other way around, that Brett definitely wasn't good enough for Eddy.

So when Eddy snuck his arms around his waist and kissed him gently, Brett's reaction was tearful.
You don't deserve this, especially after how you've been treating him.
"Brett?" Eddy asked after pulling away for a moment, realizing he was crying. "Why are you crying? Did I do something wrong? I'm sorry." Eddy's hand moved to wipe Brett's tears, but his words only made him let out a sob.
"Shit, Brett, shh, please don't cry", Eddy mumbled, sounding almost desperate now. He used his thumb to wipe Brett's tears as they fell, but they were running faster than Eddy could keep up.
"I'm sorry", Brett sobbed, really wanting to hug Eddy and hide his face in his chest, but even the thought of it made everything worse.
Idiot! What makes you think you deserve his comfort? All you do is hurt him, push him down so you can feel better yourself.

Eddy pulled the smaller man into a hug, ignoring his half hearted attempts to push him away.
"I'm sorry I make you feel bad about yourself", Brett whispered, shutting his eyes hard to try and stop the crying.
The pathetic crying again. Way to manipulate someone into liking you, if you can call it that.
"You can't help being born so beautiful, Brett", Eddy mumbled, running his hand through the back Brett's soft, dark hair.
"Stop that", Brett sobbed, grabbing a fist of Eddy's hoodie for a moment before pushing Eddy away. He looked up at him with tearful eyes. "You're everything I could ever want, and I can't even make you believe it. You deserve better than that, Eddy."

Eddy moved his arms to hold himself and looked down to his feet. He shouldn't have told Brett how he felt about that. Just look what that had done, making Brett feel bad again after everything had been so well for so long.
"You're everything I could ever want", he echoed Brett, not daring to look up at Brett as he went silent. He took a deep breath before continuing.
"And I can't even make you believe it. We're in the same boat, Brett."

"I'm sorry I'm so difficult to deal with", Brett said quietly, taking a step closer to Eddy again and holding his arms out, waiting for Eddy to complete the hug.
Eddy hugged Brett tightly, closing his eyes.
"I'm sorry I'm not better at dealing with it", Eddy sighed. "I'll keep trying to the end of the world if I have to, though."
"You shouldn't have to."
"I don't have to, I choose to."

Brett looked up at Eddy, taking deep breaths to not just start bawling again.
You don't deserve that. You don't deserve anything.
"I'm sorry I even made you choose, then."
Eddy kissed his forehead gently, wiping the single tear escaping Brett's eyes.
"You didn't. Brett, you're sick, okay? It would be like apologizing for having me make you soup when you have a cold. It's stupid, because of course I'd make soup for you."
Brett nodded quietly, not looking up at Eddy.

Eddy felt a wash of uncertainty run through him.
"And I guess sometimes I get sick too, and we'll have to make soup for each other, but because I'm so used to getting up to make soup for you, I just keep doing that even when I could ask you to do it, and you'd happily do so."
Brett nodded quietly.
"I should be better at seeing when you need soup", he mumbled, taking Eddy's hand.
"Or I could be better at telling you", Eddy added, placing his hands around Brett's hand. The cool metal of his ring touched the back of Brett's hand.
"Let's do both. I'll look better, and you tell me. I'd love to do something to feel like I deserve you", Brett said, looking up at Eddy now. He was determined not to cry again, but he could feel the sting of the tears behind his eyes anyway.
"Stop saying what you deserve and not, please", Eddy sighed, leaning forward to touch their lips together gently. "If you want me, I'm yours, okay? You don't need to earn me in any way."
Brett nodded.
"I do want you. I love you."
"I love you too, Brett."

//Y'all I love hearing what you guys think is gonna happen or just what you wanna see or anything!! Help out a tired writer pls
Love y'all //