11:28pm
"I told them."
"Damn Jackson."
"I'm horrible." I rub my face frustratingly.
Dr. Choi pats my back. Or should I say "Junwoo" pats my back. Right now, he isn't necessarily a doctor.
"No, you're not." Junwoo reassures me.
"Yes, I am. I am disgusting." I drink the last sip of my beer. I slam a bill onto the countertop, not even checking which bill it is.
Junwoo follows after me as I exit the bar.
"Jackson!" He calls for me.
Leave me be. Let me go home and drown in my own sorrow.
"Jackson!" My arm is grabbed.
I would protest but...that takes too much energy.
I need energy. My sleepless nights have depleted me of all my energy.
I miss his energy.
So much energy even when he was dying.
I miss him.
Junwoo rubs my back as I cry.
"You aren't horrible. You're an amazing person."
"Am I?" I ask, quietly.
"Telling them the truth isn't horrible. If you don't go back and talk with them, then you are terrible."
I look at the dark haired man.
"Go ahead and go to the kids tomorrow."
"They probably hate me."
"Go to his kids." Junwoo squeezes my shoulder.
His?
"To both of your kids. Go to them." Junwoo squeezes my shoulder one last time and walks into the chilly night.
"Goodnight Jackson."
"Night." I mumble as a cold wisp of wind rattles my body.
I stand outside for about an hour before I head home.
My mind and heart battle inside my head the entire time. Once my hand touches the doorknob of our house, my heart wins the battle.
Normally my mind would win however, if it's a thought of Mark, my heart will win.
He's the only person in my heart. My only love.
I'll visit them tomorrow.
I'll fix this.
Don't worry, Mark.
