1:15am
We made it.
Another year together.
Another year with Mark.
"Look at the pretty fireworks, Jackson." Mark smiles as a variety of colors paint his face.
Just like last year.
Except this year, I find him even more beautiful. His silky black hair, his dazzling brown eyes, his pearly white teeth, his gorgeous smile.
Mark is gorgeous today. Just like any day.
But, I think today, I find him more gorgeous than normal because this may be our last new year.
"What's your New Year's resolution?" Mark rests his head on his folded arms as he stares at me.
"To enjoy all of you until your last breath." I speak the pain aching truth.
Mark smiles and blushes.
"Mine is to enjoy everyday with you until I die in your arms."
A knife stabs me in my chest.
"In my arms?" I ask with a shaky voice.
"In your arms. I wouldn't want to go in any other way."
Me too. I want you to be with me forever.
I get up from the bed and I go into my closet.
"Jackson?" Mark calls from his position on the bed. I grab the small, black box sitting on the bottom shelf of my closet.
I turn back to Mark. He's sitting up on the bed now. His legs dangle on the side as he looks at me curiously.
"What's that in your hand?" Mark smirks. He thinks it's a measle gift I'm about to give him.
No.
It's much more.
I walk over to Mark. His smile drops as my left knee hits the ground. His eyes widen and his breathing becomes erratic. He's horrified.
I hold up the small, black box. I open it, revealing a bright, white diamond ring that literally makes Mark's eyes glow.
His beautiful brown eyes become wet with tears.
"I'm not asking you to marry me." I start to speak, Mark cries as he stares at me.
"It would hurt us much more. Not having time to live in marriage or to even have a proper wedding. It would hurt us."
"But Mark," I remove the ring from the box. I take Mark's pale left hand and slide the white diamond ring up his ring finger.
The ring is blindingly beautiful against his pale skin and it fits him perfectly.
"Let me make a vow to you."
Mark brings his other hand up to cover his mouth as he cries.
"I vow to only, and always, love you. No matter if your soul is beyond my reach in the heavens or if I can't feel your warmth in my arms, I will love you for forever."
"This ring is my vow. As long as it's on your finger, you'll know how much you mean to me. How much I love you."
"You now have this ring and I still have this special necklace you gave me." I touch the necklace that never leaves my neck.
I grab both of Mark's hands.
"These objects symbolize how we're bound together. Forever."
"I'll never take it off." Mark smiles through his tears.
We hug each other as the last set of fireworks erupt outside.
This is our last year together.
It's almost two years of us first meeting. Who would've known that Mark's simple, kind gestures could change my life.
He's relieved my pain yet...he's giving me the worst pain imaginable.
This pain is worst than my depression.
I'm losing my savior, my angel, my first love.
Instead of feeling empty and worthless, I feel helpless and scared.
I don't want to lose him, but there's nothing I can do to help.
I just have to sit and wait.
Sit and wait until....
Mark is gone.
HAPPY NEW YEAR'S!!♡♡
