DISGUYSED

Forgive and Forget

"What a rush!" I said, pumping my hand in the air excitedly. Sadly enough, that was probably my most rebellious stunt in a while.

Paxton let out an airy laugh as he held the movie theater door open for me, walking out into the chilly night. He shoved his gloved hands into his pockets, "A rush?" He asked me in disbelief.

"Well, it's...kind of rebellious. Isn't it? Escaping?" I said, smiling.

"In a way. I suppose." He said unsurely, smiling widely and patting my head as if I were slow.

I chuckled and nudged him with my elbow, "Shut up."

His pale eyes glinted in the moonlight, "So, what do you want to do?" He asked, "Since our movie plans were kind of...an all around failure."

I laughed, "Want to just walk around? I've been in Chicago for a while, but I still haven't seen much." I shrugged.

"Same," He agreed, his sight dancing around the street, the city lights glimmering in his eyes like brightly colored stars.

We walked and talked for what felt like forever but added up to 30 minutes. Eventually, we stopped at an intersection as we were heading back towards the movie theater to see if the guys had formed a search party yet.

"So," Paxton started, grinning brightly, "Are you going to tell me why you were mad at Alex?"

I felt my palms get sweaty. I couldn't believe he remembered that. Was it that important to him? "Does it matter?" I asked, scoffing as if it were no big deal.

"Well, I'd like to know what changed your mind." Paxton shrugged. "You've been so dead set on seeing the good in him, and now all of a sudden you've just changed your mind? I'm curious."

I bit my lip. I couldn't tell him. Not without revealing my secret, that is. Even if I did reveal my secret and tell him, I knew that things wouldn't go over well if I told him that Alex had kissed me. Paxton told me that he loved my "sister," which was aptly me. If he knew, then he might do more damage to Alex than he had ever before. Not that Paxton was a violent person in that sort of way, but you never know, and I didn't feel like taking that chance.

Lately, though, I'd been wondering if telling my secret to Paxton would be a good thing. If Alex knew, why shouldn't the one person I loved more then anyone know, too? And what was the point of coming here, anyway, then, if he didn't know I was a girl? Just to stay "best buds" as guys? If he truly liked me, and I liked him, maybe we could be something more then friends. We couldn't, though, if I remained a guy.

Decisions, decisions...

"It's not big deal, really," I lied, "I just got fed up with him, you could say."

He raised a brow, "You could say?" He mimicked quizzically.

I sighed, pursing my lips. All the air left my lungs, and blood pumped in my eats from my incessant, speedy heart beat. I wanted to tell him so badly. I didn't want to lie; but I couldn't hurt him like that by telling him.

I bit my lip down so I felt the metallic, copper tinge of blood. I ignored it. My voice was soft as a whisper, "I just don't want to waste my time anymore is all." I mumbled.

Utter silence.

We crossed the street once the light blinked green for us to cross. Once we reached the other sidewalk, Paxton mustered up his soft voice, "Well, you don't need to worry about me not approving your decision." He said playfully, a joyful glint in his eyes.

I felt a smirk tug at my lips. I scoffed jokingly, "Like I needed your approval."

Paxton laughed, his smile radiating brighter than any street lights. We were just about done with our walk, since we were a block away from the movie theater.