DISGUYSED

Missing You

Alex’s POV

The snow was the only light thing in a world of darkness.

Snowflakes were odd. They all looked alike, yet they were supposedly all different. The intricate lace design could be easily distinguished on each one. You wouldn’t be able to tell from far away, but on closer inspection, they each had distinctive qualities of their own. They were kind of like people, in that way.

I watched the snowflakes gently fall to the earth, forming in clusters as the all melted together on the ground. I felt my mind begin to wander, something that never spelled out anything with good intention.

I stared down through my snow blurred vision at the frozen stream bellow me. I’d spent so many summers in this very spot, never thinking time would change. I never thought that time would move so fast. I settled down under the snow free oak and rested my head on it’s bark, looking up at the dark sky as it spawned the mysterious white, lacy specks of ice.

I chattered my teeth as I buttoned up my coat more. Maybe I shouldn’t have stormed out like that. My anger was always a problem; it always got me in trouble eventually, or ended up hurting someone. I sighed.

Suddenly, I felt my pocket buzz. Frowning, I picked it up, reading the screen that spelt out “1 new text.” I tempted fate and opened it, seeing that it was, yet again from Ron.

“Hey, Alex you idiot. Yeah, I know it probably doesn’t concern you, but we’re freaking worried. We’re cold and sick and tired right now. When I find you I am going SO Jackie Chan on your ass. –Ron”

I would’ve laughed at her unceasing efforts to find me, if it weren’t for that growing pain in my chest. What was wrong with me? I would be able to laugh for hours at this not just over a few months ago. Was it Ron? Was it me? I didn’t know. All I did know, was that I wasn’t only worried for her safety, but her health out here in the freezing cold weather. Goddammit, what was wrong with me? I sighed.

She was really mad at me.

I guess I’d have to apologize later.

I wasn’t ever really good at apologizing, though.

“Alex!”

I turned around, scowling, fresh, hot tears burning my eyes. It stung, but I wouldn’t let her see.

“Alex!”

She started approaching me in the underbrush, a usually lonely area for me.

“Why are you here at our special place all alone?”

I frowned, knitting my eyebrows together and closed my eyes.

Confused, I wiped my tears with the muddy sleeve of my jacket, “You’re not mad at me?” I asked, my voice hoarse. I hiccupped from the tears, my eyes were puffy and red, but she still stared at me like I was the most beautiful creature in the world.

Her big, eyes looked at me with the warmth and compassion no one ever shared with me, “How could I be mad at you, Alexander?”

I scowled, flustered. I scrambled to my feet and stomped off a few feet away from her, “d-Don’t call me that! I’m Alex!” I mentally scolded myself. Bad, Alex! Now she’ll never want to come near you!

Her beautiful black curls sat on her shoulders delicately, her bare foot sinking into the cool pond water next to out special place. She motioned for me to sit back down with her, her placid disposition not faltering for even the slightest of seconds. She was the most graceful creature in the world, and she was stuck here with a barbaric delinquent like me. How was she not mad?

“Sit down, Alexander.” She said, a smirk on her rosy lips.

This time, I didn’t argue.

Slowly, I sat back down next to her, suddenly feeling her two arms wrap around my shoulders, squeezing the life out of me…but in a good way. For once, I felt safe; secure. Like there was nothing in the world that could hurt me.

“…S-So, you’re really not mad at me?” I hiccupped, my eyes stinging with tears.

“Of course not,” She said, pulling me back so I could meet her gaze. Her warm, welcoming gaze. “How could I ever stay mad at you, my very own brother?”

I sighed, opening my eyes to take in the nostalgic scenery, I sighed and turned away.

It's almost too much to bear.

Maybe I really should apologize.