The ultimate joke book

Funny,Cute and Crazy pick-up lines

You may fall from the sky, you may fall from a tree, but the best way to fall... is in love with me.

If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, don't worry I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas.

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

A boy gives a girl 12 roses. 11 real, 1 fake and he says to her " I will stop loving you when all the roses die"

I'll be Burger King and you be McDonald's. I'll have it my way, and you'll be lovin' it.

Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I'll give it back.

Know what's on the menu? Me-n-u.

Crap. Something is wrong with my cell phone. {Oh Really. What is that?} Its just that...your numbers not in it.

If I received a pound for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd be a billionaire!

Are you a parking ticket? Because you've got FINE written all over you.

You're so beautiful you made me forget my pick up line.

Do I know you? Cause you look a lot like my next girlfriend.

I'm no photographer, but I can picture us together.

It's a good thing that I have my library card. Why? Because I am totally checking you out!!

See my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I'm cute.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

People call me John, but you can call me Tonight!

I want to tell you your fortune. [Take her hand and write your phone number on it.] Your future is clear.

Did the sun come up or did you just smile at me?

If beauty were time, you'd be eternity.

Did you have lucky charms for breakfast? Because you look magically delicious!

There are 20 angels in the world 11 are playing, 8 are sleeping and 1 of them is standing in front of me.

You are so sweet you could put Hershey's out of business.

I have a boyfriend. [Guy] I have a pet goldfish. [Girl] What? [Guy] I thought we were talking about things that didn't matter.

Say "I bet I can kiss you on the lips without touching you." and kiss her, then tell her you lost the bet.

Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?

Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.

Your eyes are bluer than the Atlantic ocean, and baby I'm lost at sea!

It's a good thing I wore my gloves today; otherwise, you'd be too hot to handle.

I'm not trying to impress you or anything, but... I'm Batman!

You know what material this is? [Grab your shirt] Boyfriend material.

My love for you is like diarrhea, I just cant hold it in!

If you were a burger at McDonald's you'd be the McGorgeous.

Was your Dad a baker? Because you've got a nice set of buns.

Can you kiss me on the cheek so I can at least say a cute girl kissed me tonight?

I must be a snowflake, because I've fallen for you.

Was that an earthquake or did you just rock my world?

Excuse me, if I go straight this way, will I be able to reach your heart?

You are the reason Santa even has a naughty list.

I can't think of anyone else I'd rather survive a Zombie Apocalypse with.

If I had a garden I'd put your two lips and my two lips together.

Could you please step away from the bar? You're melting all the ice!

Do you have a mirror in your pocket? 'Cause I could see myself in your pants.

Can you take me to the bakery? Because, I want a Cutiepie like you!

You look cold. Want to use me as a blanket?

Looks like you dropped something , My jaw!

I've noticed you noticing me and I'm just giving you notice that I've noticed you!

Would you sleep with a stranger? [No] Then Hi, my name is...

I think it is time I tell you what people are saying behind your back. Nice Ass!