The ultimate joke book

Funny insults 2

Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth.

If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world.

It's better to let someone think you are an Idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.

Wife: "I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?" Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."

I may love to shop but I'm not buying your bullshit.

I researched your entire family tree and it seems you were the sap.

You are so old, even your memory is in black and white.

Ever since I saw you in your family tree, I've wanted to cut it down.

You're a person of rare intelligence. It's rare when you show any.

I used to think that you were a big pain in the neck. Now I have a much lower opinion of you.

Did you hear about the two bald guys who put their heads together? They made an ass out of themselves!

Wipe your mouth, there's still a tiny bit of bullshit around your lips.

I googled who gives a shit my name was not in the results.

Your comeback was so stupid, it didn't even comeback!

I don't remember asking you for your opinion, but since we're sharing how we feel... I think you should go away.

Girl 1: Do you have a valentines day present yet?

Girl 2: How about a punch in the face?

I'm not an astronomer, but I'm pretty sure that the Earth revolves around the Sun and not you.

I guess those penis enlargement pills are working - you're twice the dick you were yesterday!

A pretty girl can kiss a guy, a bird can kiss a butterfly, the rising sun can kiss the grass, but you my friend!! yes you!! YOU CAN KISS MY ASS.

If you didn't have feet you wouldn't wear shoes.....then why do you wear a bra?

If you're gonna act like a dick you should wear a condom on your head so you can at least look like one !!!

Hmm...I dont know what your probelm is...but I'm going to bet it's really hard to pronounce...

There are some stupid people in this world. You just helped me realize it.

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