Fairytale | Jerza | AU

55. Epiphany

Morning

Erza's POV:

     It would be safe to say I didn't sleep a wink last night. Jellal had answered my question with a sheepish nod and replied, "That's why, I want you to think this through, Erza. When you have decided, whatever your response will be, I will accept it."

     After Jellal and Gray had left, I had changed into comfortable clothes and took a long, relaxing bath. Not that it helped. My mind was plagued with thoughts, as I tried to see what I truly wanted.

     On one hand, I knew Jellal was a good person and maybe... Just maybe I was romantically attracted towards him. On the other, what if it was just guilt, like he said? Also, there was the fact that Jellal was going to leave us for five years.

     After rolling in my bed for a few hours, not being able to sleep, I had come down to the kitchen to get some water. I decided to go through what the both of us had, since the start, very slowly.

     'First was the bump in the corridor... He was so rude then. Nothing he did helped, really... Then he confessed. That.. I still regret my actions.' I shook my head and said to myself, "Look at it from a third person's point of view."

     'I rejected him. Then I apologized and tried to make peace. He accepted. We became friends. We got closer to each other. I came to know him and understand him... He too, understood me. He helped me whenever I was stuck. He took care of me... He became a better person. He became a close friend, a treasured friend to me...'

     As I took another sip of water, I let myself be honest, 'I started to think he looked handsome, attractive even. His hair falling in locks onto his face started to make my heart skip a beat. Everytime he was nice to me, my heart felt like it would burst... I could rely on him and-'

     My chain of thoughts was broken by a notification on my phone. It was Mirajane, saying that she would drop by my house today to collect the dress. I checked the time, it was 6:48 am. I didn't know what to say. So I just replied an OK.

     'Ofcourse, and there was last night... It was just- magical! I don't have any other words for it.'

     I was up all night and sleep was really about to overcome me. But despite the heaviness in my eyes, I couldn't fall asleep. I kept thinking, 'Do I actually love him? Or... Do I just like him? Will this feeling pass in a few months?'

     Even though I didn't understand the depth of my feelings for him, I now knew that they were there. The new question was, how much, and whether or not those would be enough to stand the test of time and distance. 'Should I just lie to him, saying that I didn't feel anything..? Or should I tell him the truth, and make him conflicted too?'

     So, here I was, sitting in the living room with Mirajane, reflecting upon my life decisions while listening to her advices. Mirajane had come to take the dress and wouldn't take no for an answer. No matter how much I tried to tell her that I could take it to the laundry, she was stubborn on doing it herself.

    "Mira, I... I really don't know..." I started. She sat straighter and asked, "Don't know if you like him or not?" I shook my head, "No... I don't know if I like him enough."

     Mirajane tilted her head, as if she was thinking hard about it. Then, after a moment, she asked me, "Tell me Erza, if you see Jellal in another woman's arms, how would you feel?"

     "Revolted! Hurt... Jealous." I replied, "But I know that, I know that I like him..." But Mira continued, "It's not like you are breaking contact with each other right? Now, imagine Jellal after five years, he's got a job, a house.  And imagine him in another woman's arms."

     "Still jealous." I replied. "Or maybe... If I am over him, I might not feel jealous... But what if he gets over me? There won't be any meaning to what I feel for him..."

     Mirajane shook her head and said, "I don't think he will, Erza. I have known him for longer than you think. You don't have to be best friends with someone to know them. Sometimes, you can also learn by observing. And he has been around me pretty much all his life. Elementary school, Middle school, High school..."

     Basically, what I mean is that, he isn't the type of person who would let go of something that's precious to him just like that. In the end, it depends on the two of you... but I'm sure if you try, you guys can make it work." Mirajane smiled.

     "I.. see. Thank you, Mira. You have no idea how much you helped me. Thank you for listening to me." I said to her. She waved it off, saying, "I am glad to help you... I know, the first time we met, I might have weirded you out. But I have a knack of shipping people that work out. I was actually worried in the second year... But you eventually became friends, and I was truly hoping for you to be more."

    I laughed. It was true, what she said. She smiled and said, "Then, I'll take my leave. I expect your dress to be back by Wednesday. I'm sorry for ruining it... See you later!"

     I nodded and walked her to the gate, closing it after she left. I had to talk to Jellal now. I had decided what exactly I wanted.

Jellal's POV:

     Erza was standing at my door, looking extremely nervous. I moved aside and let her in. She stepped in and stood awkwardly in the living room while I closed the door behind her.

     "Please, take a seat, Erza." I said and gestured towards the sofa. I sat on a chair opposite to her and asked her, "Would you like something to drink?" She shook her head and said, "I actually wanted to talk to you."

     I nodded, letting her continue. She spoke further, "I thought a lot about... everything... last night. And I have come to a decision..."

     I do like you. It's not guilt or any underlying regret. I really do like you" She was blushing. I tried hard to keep the grin on my face from showing. She continued, "But... You're going away. For five years."

     I'm not sure, I mean, I do like you right now, in this moment... But I'm not sure if I'll feel the same way, as strongly I feel about you after five years. You are precious to me, as a friend...for now. I don't want to lose you...But..."

     "But you don't know if a long distance relationship is going to work out or not." I said, interrupting her for the first time. She nodded, "Yeah."

     I smiled and said, "It's understandable." She nodded again. After a short moment of silence, she spoke again, "But I want to see... I want to wait for you and see if I still like you. If you still like me. If we can still be together after all..."

     My eyes met hers, she was blushing profusely and I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I cautiously asked, "You... You mean it?" She stared at me with determination and replied, "Yes."

     "We can.. we can try! I could never stop loving you, Erza." I said, my face going red. I saw her blush too, hiding her red face behind her hands. She stuttered, "I-I wouldn't either."

     I'm sure my face rivaled her hair. I got up from my chair and sat down next to her. "Do you- you mean it?" She removed her hands from her face and nodded. I smiled, truly happy that she liked me.

     "Then, can I..." I said, cupping her face in my hands. Her face became, if possible, even red. I leaned in and moved closer, our lips meeting.  When we broke apart, I asked her, "Can you stay here today? Just today... We can watch movies or something. I want to spend today with you."

     She grinned and replied, "Yes! I would love to." I was so happy. It felt like a dream. I stroked her cheek with my thumb and said, "I love you so much, Erza..." She replied, "I love you too, Jellal."

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Next Update: 12th April, 2021