Core of My Heart [UNDER EDITING]

Suspicions

Kaelynn's P.O.V.

                                    "MOMEEEEEE!" I heard Char shout down the hallway, causing me to groan in annoyance. She just loves calling Ciara "Mom" or "Mommy" or whatever. I, on the other hand, still hasn't had the guts to call her that.

I don't know why, because she had been acting as a good mom. I'm blaming it on the fact that I haven't said that word in so long it's had an affect on me.

Tiara and I were texting, and she was going on and on about her boyfriend, Chance, whom I've seen a few times before. I realize I text the twins a lot. They and Jaira are the closest friends I have that are true and aren't just using me. And even though I've unintentionally pushed them away a few times, they always came back. Like Ciara. My mom. It's still weird to call her that, 'My mom'. It seems unnatural, yet natural and completely understandable. Luckily, she hasn't talked to me about that, so I have more time to contemplate whether I should force myself to say it randomly, or just wait for her to talk to me about it.

Unfortunantly, Brian's here, and that's the reason I'm huddled up in my room. Seriously, I don't like that guy, and I have no idea why. Something about him screams 'Danger', but he doesn't show signs of being a dangerous person. I'm going with my instincts, and gut feeling, and just stay away from him. Clearly, Ciara nor Char senses anything bad about him. Well, if they do, they don't show it. I may sound cautious and straight up crazy, however, I'm still going with my senses. They sensed something about that Ann woman, so they must be right about Brian.

A knock sounded on my door, and I told them they could come in. Ciara smiled as she slipped in and closed the door. I noticed she looked happier, and it reminded me of the last time we talked in my room. She was so pale and unhealthy, I couldn't bear it.

"Hey, KayKay," she said, walking over and taking a seat on the edge of my bed.

"Hi," was the only thing I could muster, and I knew I sounded like an idiot. I halted the conversation with Ti, and put my phone on the charger beside my bed.

"Why aren't you down there with us? I've noticed that whenever he's down there, you're up here. Tell me what's wrong."

Really? I kind've thought she was about to ask me the name question, but she asks me this instead? How can I explain it to her without sounding crazy and like a jealous person?

"Well...nothing, really," I lied.

Ciara had an 'Are you serious?' look on her face. "Kaelynn, don't lie to me. I know when you're lying and that's not cool."

I let out a sigh I had no idea I was holding. "If I tell you this, you'll think I'm crazy jealous. Sooooo, I can't."

"Kaelynn. Tell me. Now."

"Okay, okay. It's just...I don't like Brian. I never really did. There's something about him that I can't stand, but I don't know what it is. My gut doesn't like him at all, and I believe it. I always trust my gut about these kind of things."

Ciara nodded and looked as if she was thinking about what I had said. Hopefully, I sound civilized and sane.

"Kaelynn...do you always think somebody isn't any good?"

Unbelievable. Out of what I just said, she decides to say that. Somehow, I should've expected it. Always there to defend Brian. That just got me heated.

"You know what? Just please leave. You--nobody believes me, and I won't deal with it. Better yet, I'll go to Ti's house."

I stood up and was about to pack some clothes into a bag. Ciara's brown eyes widened.

"Kaelynn, no--"

"Ciara, yes. It's clear that you don't think I've changed, and that I just want to hate everyone. So, I'm going to Tamara and Tiara's house for a night or two. Some mom you are."

I knew that hurt Ciara, but I didn't care at the moment. I was infuriated and didn't care about anything but getting away from here. Ciara sniffed a few times, but I didn't show that I was paying any attention to her. I got a drawstring bag and began stuffing clothes inside.

"Kaelynn, please don't go. I-I'm sorry that I said that. Please stay here--"

"No, because you rather take up for him instead of listening to your own daughter! And you were talking about 'trust' and 'love' and all that crap! And here I am, trying to talk to you, and you just..."

From that point, I went on a rage. I couldn't stop the words that were flying out my mouth and directed towards the startled woman. Everything that I've held back over the past few months was shouted without a second thought. It was as if the emotional wall inside of me was broken and every thought turned into a flood that's released.

And Ciara just stood there and took it. Yeah, she would try to say something, and I would shout over her. Otherwise, she just listened and looked guilty. To be honest, I was surprised she didn't lose her temper with me, like any other parent would have.

In the end, I found myself crying into Ciara's chest. She held me close and rocker me back and forth, like the baby I was acting as. I had just completely broke down into sobs, and Ciara had pulled me in close. Like any caring mom would have done.

"I'm so sorry," I sobbed. "You are a good mom, Ciara! And I love you so much, and--"

"Shhhhhhhh..." she cooed, soothingly.

"You're the best mom in the world. Nobody can say you're not."

Ciara chuckled before placing a kiss upon my forehead.

***

"Okay, do you want to tell me now?" Ciara asked later on that day, when we were in her bed.

Brian had to work and wouldn't be here until the morning. So, I took the oppurtunity to sleep here, in this comfy bed.

"Tell you what?" I questioned,

"About Brian. And how you don't like him. And I promise that I'll listen and be good." Ciara flashed an award-winning smile.

"Okay...the vibes I get from him aren't good. I don't know what it is, but I don't like it. I sound like one of those psychics!"

Ciara considered--or atleast looked like it-- what I said. I could practically see the gears turning in her head.

"What things have you noticed about him that you don't like?" She asked.

Finally! She believes me!

"How he acts so calm about things. Too calm, ya know? And how he's so interested in you. He doesn't ask you things, then relate them to something that had happened to him. He just frequently asks questions. And when you ask him things, he gives you short answers. That's just not normal, you know?"

Ciara nodded. "Yeah, I've noticed that."

"That just doesn't seem normal. And whatever he's up to, I don't want you to get hurt."

I felt her eyes pierce into me as I found the comforter interesting.

"Why?" She asked. What a stupid question. Not that I was calling her stupid.

"Because you're my mom. I can't let anything happen to you...Mom."

And that was the first time I've called her that. A smile spread across her face and she pulled me into a hug, crying tears of happiness.

Finally, I felt like I had a family.

A/N: Sorry it took so long, I had to download another app to finish writing it.
Thank you for the views and votes and comments and all that crap! It really means a lot!!! :D

The media is the current cover and another 8 Flavahz video. Random, I know! It's a performance in 2012 they did at the World of Dance.

I got only 4-5 chapters left before this book comes to an end. *cries*

So, that's all I got to say for now.

FlavahzNation Forever!