Fifty Shades Of Love, Sex And Tears

Chapter 10 - Enjoying Living

Charlotte's POV
Living, actually living life has always been effort and never easy until now. I enjoy waking up in the morning and living a life that has a meaning to an extent that makes each day go by quicker than it used to.

Being with Christian, even though usually never more than a couple of hours, allows me a chance to forget about everything else that is going on around. "Let me take control of one aspect of your life so you don't have to think about it." Were the words he'd used described what I couldn't put into words. And then when I'm not physically with him, I think about him which can distract me enough to forget about the life I'm living.

It was a warm day in mid-July and I wished our apartment had a balcony so I could sit and do nothing in the sun. I had just been to buy Kate some clothes for her birthday next week. She was as usual going to Barbados with her family to celebrate the occasion. Her parents, Carla and Eamon had asked if I had wanted to join them for the trip as I am their 'surrogate daughter' they reminded me but I had said no. I already owed them so much from the apartments and holidays to the secret keeping, that I didn't want to take anymore. I also wanted to use the lack of distractions in the apartment to get Thomas' book ready to be published as well as do some serious job hunting.

With Christian being out of town all week, I was free to help Kate pack in her standard last minute state for her flight that left that evening. We were trying to pack everything but the kitchen sink into a bag for half the amount of clothes that she had so I was trying to pick out the items she wouldn't wear when I found a pair of crotch-less underwear. "Is this a family vacation" I questioned holding them up making her screech my name just as the front door opened and Elliot walked in. Kate grabbed the underwear, hiding it from him like she was embarrassed. "Why bother? He'll see it anyway," I laughed as I went to make us all a drink.

When he moved away from the door I spotted his suitcase, "You're moving in? or you're going too?" I asked hopeful the yes would refer to the first question as Elliot and I get on really well ever since I met him. We had spent a few evenings together mostly with Kate or when he is early or Kate is more likely than not, late.

"Yes, I'm going too, didn't want her to spend her birthday alone," he said going over to kiss Kate. I didn't know if their relationship or my own for that matter was going to last. From what I had heard Elliot Grey was 'the fuck boy of Seattle' and like me had sleep with nearly half of it. We concurred one evening waiting for Kate that we had never slept together, but in fact one-night last year we'd been drinking together with friends, and I'd gone home with one his mates. I had to be honest, I didn't remember this evening like many others until we actually spoke about it.

But Kate wasn't like us, yes, she had one-night stands but not as many. She always had dreams of the big white wedding, children, growing old with someone, and I didn't know if that was the life Elliot imagined. As for me, I could never imagine myself in that life - 4 children, married, house by the water. The dream most girls had, I simply didn't, life could never and would never be that simple for me.

"You won't be alone either you'll have Teddy and Christian to keep you busy." Kate pulled me from my thoughts, "No, I'll have wine and work." I joked walking away from the love birds before heading to the gym after saying goodbye to the two of them, telling Kate her present would arrive at the hotel on the 20th, her 23rd birthday and reminding her to text me when she lands and to send me photos.

The evening was the best time to go to the gym, it was quiet and the people who were there didn't talk much because they didn't want to be talked to either. Going to the gym, working out grounds you, like Christian does, your body releases endorphins different to any you can be prescribed. Sport is always there, you can always run, walk, go to the gym. It has helped me over the years both here and in England. I was the only non-sport major on the track team at WSU and I still hold the sprinting records at English Schools over all ages.