𝐕𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐍𝐀 - wilbursoot

𝐟𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐲 𝗼𝐧𝐞

about a week later, wilbur decided to stop by vienna's place for a little before stream. he did want to see her, but he also wanted something to read.

after the poem she told him to read the other night, he asked to borrow the book so he could read it on his own. she gave it to him before they parted ways with a hug.

now, he was standing outside her door with the book in hand. he knocked and waited for an answer. "coming!" there it is.

all he could hear was ruffling from the inside. vieanna finally opened the door after a few moments, still trying to pull a sweater over her head. she quirked an eyebrow. "wilbur? what're you doing here?"

he slightly waved the book in front of her. "i finished the book and was wondering if i could borrow another?"

she adjusted her sweater to fit right. "oh! yeah, yeah that's fine. i actually have to go to work right now. i'm running a little late. you know where i keep my books, just take whichever one you want and make sure the door is locked on your way out!"

she grabbed her keys from the table next to the door and gave wilbur a quick hug before exchanging goodbyes. he walked into the quiet apartment and made his way to vienna's room.

he squatted down to the height of the shelf. it was lined with so many books, some seemingly worn out and others that were almost perfect at the spine. some lay horizontal and others stood vertically.

one specifically caught his attention. the book was an off-white color with a simplistic, red design on it. he picked it up from the pile it laid on, running a finger down the spine. he turned it over to face the cover.

in the middle of the design read inward. author, yung pueblo. the book still seemed relatively new. this was the one he'd read.

he sat criss cross on the floor now. he opened the book and started to read the pages.

page 5 was marked.

three things that make life harder:
not loving yourself
refusing to grow
not letting go

page 11 was annotated.

when we disconnect
from our pain
we stop growing

when we are dominated
by our pain
we stop growing

freedom is observing our pain
letting it go
and moving forward

(middle path)

annotated: refusing to face your pain does no good. you do not grow from hiding away. do not let it control you. face it.

page 13 was annotated.

one of my greatest
mistakes
was believing
that another person
could hold together
all the pieces of me

annotated: only you can permanently help yourself.

page 22 was annotated.

healing yourself can be messy

seeing yourself through honesty
can be jarring and tough; it can even
temporarily cause imbalance in your life

it is hard work to open yourself
up to release your burdens

like removing thorns from your body,
it may hurt at first, but it is
ultimately for your highest good

the dark clouds of rainfall are
necessary for new growth

annotated: forgive yourself for the "bad" days.

page 25 was annotated.

i spent most
of my life
trying to prove
to myself and others
that i had no pain
and felt no sorrow

annotated: stop hiding, embrace yourself.

page 32 was annotated.

if you
are far away
from yourself,
how could
you ever be
close to another?

annotated: come to terms with yourself so you can be the best you for him.

he closed the book and placed it on his lap. he sat there for three minutes in silence before leaving to his office.

author's note
i started reading poetry again after having no motivation to do so since december and this was the one i chose. so yes, i'm back on my poetry arc ☝️