An Omega's Desire

Chapter Eight: "Past & Present Sins"

Sean napped on and off in his bowl chair as he munched on Mark's homemade cookies. He was barely watching the movie playing on his tv. His body was in pain again, forcing him to put the heated fox against his pelvis to dull the pain. Yet, he was snuggled against the cool blanket to keep his head from feeling like it was boiling. His father told him symptoms would come and go throughout the day. He believed it. Just nibbling on the cookie, he set it aside as his stomach suddenly didn't want it. Rolling over to stare into the depths of his chair, he whined softly. He hated this feeling. It felt like his whole body hated him. Every few hours his dad would come up to check on him. Taking his blanket to put in the freezer for a bit to make it cooler or heating his fox back up. Sean wanted to take a shower but had no motivation to move or stand up. He just wanted everything to stop moving and making noise. Napping helped ease the pain. As night fell, Sean finally forced himself to sit up. He felt like pacing a little to stretch his legs. A sense of anxiousness was making him tense. He began pacing his room when the sound of a loud motorcycle made him wince and growl.

His ears were sensitive to the noise, but he liked the vibration it gave him. Moving to his window, he leaned against the frame to peek outside. It sounded like it was getting louder, and he wanted to see it go by. Sighing heavily, he watched a suitor across the street giving a gift to an Omega. The Omega grinned brightly, waving to the woman. The woman then moved to sit on the curb, growling at the two other suitors that were also sitting there. Sean glanced at his yard curiously. Mark and Nate weren't staking themselves at his house. Were they waiting until he went into heat? Were they chased off by his mother after their behavior? He wanted to be happy about it... but part of him was a little upset that he didn't have suitors eager to defend him. Scoffing, Sean rolled his eyes and let the curtain fall back into place. He didn't want horny wolves on his lawn. He tried to force himself to be happy about chasing such lust driven people... but his heart ached to have what that Omega had. The suitors on his lawn were tense, but they way they looked up at his window with such... affection in their eyes. It hurt to feel alone and unwanted. Turning from the window, he mumbled out himself. "They just want to fuck him... It's not love. They'd do anything for attention."

Sliding down the wall to sit down, Sean dropped his head on his bend knees. It frustrated him just how much he hated and loved himself. The motorcycle sounded like it was right outside, but he'd lost his interest. He guessed it was for the guy across the street. It was getting late. Suitors will have given their gifts by now. It was rare for a suitor to not use a Nesting time to make their interest known. Even anonymous gifts were given at Nesting times. Tilting his head back against the wall, he started to think about Mark and Nathan. They both had things he liked and things he hated. Yet, he could only pick one. Omegas only picked another mate if the previous one died. Omegas took mating more seriously than Alphas and Betas. It was important. Something personal and took a lot to open themselves enough to mate. Mating made an Omega vulnerable. While Alphas and Betas were not always as faithful, nor did they have to be. To them mating didn't hold the same consequences. It was an itch to scratch. A desire and nothing more. Sean shook his head in defeat. He didn't know who to present himself to. Some part of him didn't want to choose either. To choose meant he'd accept his role as an Omega, and he didn't want that.

It was bad enough his body was making him feel things he didn't want to feel. He didn't want to lose himself to it. He wanted to stay strong... but it was getting harder to do that. His emotions were a curse. It was hard to sort out what he wanted. He wanted to be loved but didn't want to be a victim of it. Just as his eyes were tearing up at the thought of being the only Omega that would never be truly happy with himself, his dad slipped into the room. Sean tightened his arms around his legs as he leaned forward off the wall. His dad turned to face him after seeing he wasn't in the chair and said as he pointed to the window excitedly. "Look outside. Quick." Sean peeked over the rim of the window briefly with disinterest, then did a double take. Rolling over onto his knees, he put his hands on the windowsill and looked at his lawn. A beautiful red motorcycle sat at the curb and a man he didn't recognize was climbing off it. Sean's eyes widened a little as curiosity piqued his interest. Almost kissing the windowsill, Sean asked softly. "Who is that? I've never seen him before. Is he with the City Wolves?" His dad moved closer, peaking out with him as he excitedly told him. "No. Not a chance. He's wearing a Country Wolf patch on his jacket. The Silver Timber Wolves. I haven't seen them since I was a pup. I thought the pack moved... but maybe they have moved back."