Selenophile // Marauders

|123| Lack of Memories

20th of September, 1978

Riley refused to leave the house, she hadn't went to a single order meeting since the funeral. She hadn't even left the house to get the groceries, and this meant she hadn't eaten properly for days.

She had eaten all of the leftover food she could find, never cooked anything new. If there weren't any leftovers, she took a snack from the cupboard. Some were already expired, making it harder to find something that wouldn't make her sick.

Then, a silvery animal came through. It looked like a bird — it was a pigeon.

"Er — it's Will. Do you wanna talk sometime?" the patronus said.

Riley took out her wand.

"Expecto patronum," she said weakly. A silver light flickered from the tip of her wand, then vanished without taking any shape or form. "Expecto patronum," she repeated. Nothing happened.

She couldn't think of the same memory she always thought about while casting the charm, it didn't make her happy, it made her sad instead. She tried to think of another one.

"Expecto patronum," she said more clearly. "Expecto patronum!"

Nothing happened.

"Expecto patronum!"

The fox appeared finally, Riley didn't know whether to be relieved or upset.

"Sure."

The fox disappeared and went to deliver the short message.

Another thing which had changed for Riley was that there were many more dents in the walls then there ever had been. Most were around the living room, some were in her room. But luckily, she had managed to get better at healing charms.

She sat back on the couch, grabbing the muggle newspaper.

Marvin Beylier has still not been found after eleven days of searching.

A photograph of Marvin Beylier was put right next to the writing. It was the waiter from the coffee shop who had been murdered. She turned the page, avoiding the rest of the news.

There was a knock on the door. Riley took out her wand as a reflex, then took a deep breath. Why would a fucking death eater knock, idiot? she thought silently.

"Who is it?"

"Will. Will Dalton, I play for the Chudley Cannons, I just sent a patronus, it's a pigeon—"

Riley opened the door, seeing the old quidditch captain standing with no expression whatsoever.

"Hey," said Will. "What have you been up to?"

"Not much. Nothing, actually," said Riley quietly.

"On my side, I've punched Ethan in the face." Will smiled.

Riley blinked. "You — what—"

"Ah, right, forgot to tell you that I got what you meant by violence that day. And when you left after he pushed you was just proof," he said casually. "Y'know, you should punch Ethan when you're angry, not the walls. It feels amazing."

Riley saw that Will was looking at the dents on the walls. "How—"

"And, right, there was a very heated argument between my dad and Ethan, even Aunt Ad couldn't stop them. I didn't even bother, watching Ethan suffer was fun, Walter thought I was a bloody psychopath for laughing. It ended with Ethan wanting to be disowned, things snowballed a bit too quickly. And Uncle Poe said he wished he didn't have Ethan as a son, that part was a bit frightening. Aunt Ad was still defending Ethan — what an idiot..."

"Oh my—"

"I think Ethan left after that, but I saw him a minute ago, think he came back. Honestly, what a coward."

"I — I don't know what to say..." she stuttered. She looked around, trying to gather up the words to speak.

"Then don't," said Will softly. "Really, it's a bit long to process."

"Yeah, too long." She looked at Will's eyes after trying to avoid them for so long. "Thanks."

"You should be proud of yourself, and I mean it. It's not easy, what you're going through. If it were me, I would've ran away from everything instead of trying to solve them." He took a deep breath. "You really are the strongest person I know, Riley Spade."

Riley smiled wryly with tears forming in her eyes.

"Y'know what I also realized?" said Will. "Penny has always been a friend to me, even though she seemed like she hated me. Because she never was the mean one, she never said anything hurtful. But Ethan always has something mean to say, even though it sometimes sounds like a meaningless joke."

Riley thought about it for a second, and he was right.

"Thanks, really. For — for taking what I said seriously."

"Of course I took it seriously, nothing good ever comes when someone mentions violence." Will smiled softly. "I got to go to her grave, by the way. Even Walter came."

"I didn't, not yet," Riley said. "I haven't been to the graveyard since last year, I think."

"You didn't go to your mum's grave, then?" asked Will shyly. Riley shook her head.

"Have you go to an order meeting, or did they even have one?" asked Riley, getting a bit uncomfortable by the last sentence.

"Yeah, once. I feel like Moody's hiding something from the rest of the order, he was talking about sending Lupin somewhere."

Riley pretended she didn't understand why Moody would send Remus somewhere. She knew what it was, even though Remus hadn't told her. Werewolves.

"Er — really?" she said.

"Yeah," said Will. "There are also some good news."

"What?"

"Longbottom and Fortescue are getting married," said Will.

"Really?!"

"It was quite obvious, they seem happy."