Being the sultan's daughter made everything easy to Nafize. But when she came of age marriage was a must and her parents chose the most unexpected person for her.
Malkoçoglu Bali Bey, was a military commander who was one of the most loyal men of th...
"Welcome back, Beyim" I greeted Bali Bey as he stepped into the main room of our palace. Bali nodded at me too busy with being smothered by our sons and daughter. Bali kissed Suleiman's head before walking over to me and taking our newborn daughter out of my arms.
"I'm glad she is healthy," Bali said looking up from our daughter to me. I avoided his eyes and nodded my head. Mustafa toddled over and wrapped his arms around my waist, I picked him up and sat him on my hip.
"Excuse me, Beyim, I promised the children to go to the main Palace so we can greet their grandfather," I said nodding my head at him before sidestepping him and nodded at Nur to bring Rukiye. At this point, I was using my father's return to get away from Bali Bey because I felt angry at him for cheating and at the same time for killing the woman he cheated on me with, it didn't matter to me that she is dead but what mattered was that later on I was visited by one of her friends informing me that Alenica was pregnant before she disappeared.
"Don't you want to spend time with me?" Bali Bey asked as Nur took Rukiye from him and was about to follow me. I stopped in front of the door frozen, guilt was eating me up, Rukiye was born but his other child did not.
"We will soon" I mumbled. I raised my hand and knocked on the door signaling the maids on the other side to open the door. I stepped out dragging Suleiman and holding tightly onto Mustafa while Nur ran after me with Rukiye and Gevherhan.
I wanted to just blurt out the truth to Bali but at the same time, I couldn't bring myself to dan that, I don't want him to ask for a divorce, I don't want us to separate for the sake of the children. What if he already knew? What if he is planning on getting revenge somehow, maybe he is being nicer as a way to torture me.
"Mommy, come on" Mustafa dragged me out of the carriage and literally ran into the palace. I took Rukiye from Nur and followed after Mustafa and Suleiman who had slipped out of Esma's grip and ran after his brother.
I walked down the hallways, I couldn't help but hallucinate, I saw her everywhere, she was standing by the windows and by the doors of every room. My breathing was getting faster and faster by the second. I saw her standing by my father's door smirking at me and sent me a kiss making me shiver.
"Are you okay, Sultanim?" I was snapped back to reality by Rüstem Pasha who looked at me somewhat worried, I was part of the ruling family after all.
"I am fine. I'm sure Mihrimah is happy over your return, Pasham" I said fixing my hold on Rukiye. Rüstem's eyes wandered down to her and I could see the want in his eyes, he yearned to have more children but we all knew that Mihrimah is barely letting him come near her.
"I doubt that," Rüstem said sadly. I for the first time ever felt bad for him. I gave him an encouraging smile before stepping into my father's room and bowed to him. My father was sitting on his bed with Mustafa on his left and Hürrem on his right, Mihrimah was standing beside Mustafa with Selim beside her followed by Beyazid, and lastly by Cihangir. Fatma Sultan was standing beside Hürrem then my mother and last but not least Gulfem hatun.
"Your majesty" I bowed in front of my father. My father stood up and walked over to me and took Rukiye from between my arms.
"I thank Allah for letting you and my granddaughter see the light of the sun after the birth," My father said patting my cheek. He pulled Rukiye up and kissed her forehead. I smiled at the sight of Rukiye in between my father's arms.
"How was your trip back, father?" I asked. My father walked back over to his bed and sat down on it again with Rukiye still in between his arms.
"It was easy thank Allah" My father answered. I smiled and nodded. I stepped back and took my place between Mihrimah and Selim who seemed to be breathing heavily. I felt the guilt come back, Alenica first and now my own brother, I wanted to kill myself from how guilty I felt but Mustafa must survive and this was the only way.
"Selim, darling are you sure you're okay?" Hürrem asked worriedly. My father looked up from my daughter and to my brother. Selim was sweating and red in the face at this point too.
"I'm fine," Selim said gruffly moving his collar as if it was choking him. He took a huge gulp of air before falling face-first on the floor. Hürrem Sultan screamed and kneeled down beside him along with Mihrimah and Fatma Sultan. Beyazid pulled Mihrimah back and let her hug him as the Aghas at the door ran to get a doctor.
"Selim" I mumbled under my breath closing my eyes as a tear trickled down my face. A hand was placed on my shoulder was the next this I felt, I opened my eyes and looked at the owner of the hand to find my brother Mustafa. I wrapped my arms around his waist and closed my eyes and tried to block the sight of the guards moving Selim from the floor onto the bed.
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"Everything will be alright" Mustafa promised in a whisper. I felt myself calm down a little as he ran his fingers through my hair trying to soothe me.
"He is not breathing" Hürrem screamed. I tightened my grip on Mustafa knowing that now I had my own brother's blood on my hands. I killed my own brother, what a monster I was. I hated how royal life and the laws in this dynasty created monsters out of the most innocent, I miss the time my biggest problem was what dress I will wear for the day.
