His Light

Regret

Alex's Pov

After I reached to hospital, I made my way to the surgery room and saw already Zac and Rowan standing there.

"Where is she?" I asked looking at the expectantly.

"Zac tell him" Rowan says bluntly.

"Is my Lilac alive or not?" Why the fuck do they need so long to answer me.

"DID SOMEONE CUT YOUR TONGUES? HUH?" I yelled at them.

"Alex, Lilac is alive, so you can relax." Zac finally said, but I knew that he had to say more.

"But Lilac's condition is critical. She damaged internal organs, that are important. The surgery she had to go through, was also not an easy one. So if she passes the first 48 hours, there won't be anything life threatening anymore, but that is up to her, if she makes it."

"Where is she? Is she awake yet?" I asked with pain in my voice. GET IT TOGETHER ALEX.

I have to be strong; I can't show any emotion. I am known to be ruthless and heartless, but why does Lilac make me act differently?

"She's on the 3rd floor in room 1010, the room we bring you to, if you get hurt. And no, she still didn't wake up, it's been 6 hours or something." Rowan answered looking at me, as if he knows that I am battling with myself.

I finally made my way up to Lilac. I was now standing in front of the door of her room. My hand on the door handle. Am I really ready to see what I did? That I began destroying an angel?

Alex get it fucking together!

And with that I opened the door entering the room. In the middle of the room was Lilac to be seen. Her beautiful body attached to machines just because of me. She had a huge bandage covering up her belly and she was wearing an oxygen mask.

Her body is so pale, she looks so lifeless.

And realization hit me again. I did this. I did this to her. I began tearing her apart not even knowing it. Why do I break and lose the good things in life? WHY?

Her body looks so fragile, as if it would break the moment you would move a single finger of her.

I took a chair, placing in next to her.

I just had those words she told me in my head.

"You made me feel safe around you."

"You are a murderer, a fucking demon"

"You made me fucking fall for you even though I knew that you wouldn't want me."

I just sat down thinking about what she told me over and over again. I decided to reach for her small hand, scared to break her even more. And the moment I touched her I felt how cold she was. She didn't even have a blanket over her small body.

I stood up and ran out to find a fucking doctor, anger blurred my vision.

"Hello sir" one of the doctors of the current ward said.

"WHY THE FUCK HAS LILAC NO BLANKETS ON HER?"

"Y-you mean Ms. Rose?" she asked nervously.

"YES, I MEAN HER! WHERE ARE HER BLANKETS? SHE'S FREEZING COLD AND YOU JUST STAND HERE DOING NOTHING! FOR WHAT DO I PAY YOU? YOU GOT A DEATH WISH?"

"I-I'm s-sorry sir. I will b-bring her some blankets right away." she said, avoiding eye contact and walking off to get the blankets.

I just went back to Lilac and sat into the chair next to her. Afterwards the doctor, I just talked to walked in with blankets in her arms. She began covering up Lilac's cold body and after that she excused herself and left the room.