That Summer In Brooklyn

Right Where You Left Me - Alternate Ending

NEW YORK, a city that never sleeps, where I spent my whole life after breaking my own heart for the second time. The only home I’ll never know and where the best nights of life happened. Even if I land in another city, I can still breathe its air. Para simula ng i-apak ko ang mga paa ko nang unang beses ay agad na tumatak sa buto ko ang New York. A town that gave me a second chance to prove myself to myself.

Pinaka-mahirap kasi talagang kalaban ang sarili at ang tanging approval na hinihintay ko ay iyong galing rin sa sarili kong isipan. Now, I am in my favorite place. I scoffed upon realizing what I have said. Hindi ko paborito kundi sa kanya at kahit maraming taon na ang lumipas, maraming tao na rin ang dumaan sa buhay ko, nandito pa rin ako sa lugar kung saan niya ako iniwan. She left me no choice but to stay here forever together with her memories, our memories back when we’re still together.

I can hear the people stare at me the phrase such as ‘what a sad view?’. People moved on, and strangers came in and out of my life, but I’m still here, right where she left me years ago. Sinabi ko na noon pa na kung hindi siya, wala na akong patutuluyin na iba sa buhay ko. Mas maigi pa na mag-isa kaysa pumasok sa isang relasyon na isa lang ang nagmamahal. I cannot give myself to anyone just like how I gave mine to her.

She was exceptional in all possible ways, and I liked it. I’m still into it up until now.

“Dad, you’re here again.” Nag-angat ako ng tingin at sumalubong sa akin ang magandang mukha ng sixteen year old kong anak na si Empress.

“Where is your Mom?” tanong ko ng maupo siya sa bakanteng upuan katapat ng kinauupuan ko.

“She dropped me off here and drives away immediately. She needs to meet Pops in Manhattan.” Summer said to me, raising her hands to get the food server’s attention. “I’ll order milkshake and mac and cheese, okay?”

“How’s school?” tanong ko kay Empress.

“It’s okay, and I have cool classmates.” Masaya niyang sabi sa akin kaya ngumiti ako. Kung nabuhay iyong anak ko sa kanya, kaedad na siya ni Empress ngayon. “Dad, do you love Mommy?”

“I did; that’s why you’re here, Em.”

“Why don’t you try to work it out?”

“It will be hard, sweetie. She’s in love with someone else, and I’m –“

“Still stuck in your past.” Maang akong napatingin sa kanya. “I know that Mom wasn’t the one you love, Dad, but did you at least try to love her the way you love this woman who still holds your heart?”

Hindi ko alam ang dapat na isagot kay Empress. Dapat mga salitang madali niya maiintindihan ang sabihin ko kaya lang hindi ko alam saan huhugot. Sinubukan ko naman na ituon ang atensyon at puso ko kay Sadie ng magkabalikan kaming dalawa. Noong una ayoko sumugal dahil baka nadala lang ako ng sakit na naramdaman ko ng hindi ako ang piliin sa huli. I got drunk and ended up in Sadie’s bed.

One-night-stand that resulted in Empress’ existence, which I partially regretted at first.

“Did you regret having me, Dad?” tanong ulit ni Empress.

“No, why did you ask? Did your Mom say something to you?”

Umiling si Empress. “I want to meet her.”