Sparks in the Dark

Butterflies

Ever since I was younger I have always adored butterflies. I loved them, no idea why, just was always pulled to them. I thought about them when I would stand during recess, I drew them on all my notebooks and doodled them on all my papers. Butterflies would fill my diary and all of my belongings. Stickers on my walls, colorings in my coloring books. Even in the summer I would see some outside every now and again. 

Growing through the years eventually I thought about them less and less, my mind being filled with white noise instead. I thought butterflies filled my stomach and chest in the past but I was mistaken, the anxiety that was trying to warn me about the swarms of wasps and bees that cut me up, yet I still mistakened them for butterfly kisses on my skin.

I had given up on butterflies. I had given up on the floating feeling of love and the freedom of it. After all, love is supposed to set you free. 

I started seeing them again, the butterflies. They would appear in messages and I would notice them at random times, like a reminder. Not a warning but a reminder, to keep moving, keep going. I ignored them mostly but. 

I'm not much good with paying attention to signs from the universe, and fate I thought was never on my side, but lesson after lesson I have learned and accepted. The butterflies have come back and I hope you understand me when I say this. 

You are my butterfly, my 나비. 

I hope, sincerely that you will through time feel the same, not everyone falls quite as quickly as me, or commits quite as fast but. I think you are the swarm of butterflies that I've been lead up to all these years. I think all the signs, all the waiting and learning, all of the butterflies I have passed. I think you are the next path I gotta take, and I will follow you, I will fly and soar with you no matter where we go.